Today I’ll answer the question from a reader who approaches a disturbing reality: how can a woman find a good sexfriend in a society where the guys are often as cheesy as a romantic comedy? It is a serious problem…
“Hello,
I think than for anyone else but you, my approach would have made me look like a slut. But since I know what you write on your blog, I think you’re one of the few people who think that a woman who has fun in bed and who is open-minded is not necessarily a slut. I regularly read your articles for two years, and even if I do not agree on everything you write, I think you have correctly identified the woman mind and the science of seduction.
I’m at a point in my life where I want to have fun in bed, I want to have fun without headache. But now, attracting THE guy we covet in our bed is not as simple as it seems! Contrary to popular belief, a lot of guys are looking for serious relationships only and get excited for something serious too quickly…
To me, (most) guys are not really able to compartmentalize. Either they really like the girl and they want a serious couple or they don’t really like her and in this case they just see want a one shot. Having regular sex dates with a guy, that seems to me almost impossible… That’s why I want you to tell me how to get into the game. What is a girl supposed to do so the man she wants invites her to take pleasure?
Hoping that you’ll find the time to answer me. Especially that, to my knowledge, we are a lot of women reading you and we are all facing the same questions…
Chloé “
If I have identified the problem, many women have trouble finding guys:
– They like ;
– Who can fuck them good but with respect ;
– Who do not ask them to be faithful while they only fucked a few times together.
Many guys are very mushy. Much more than one might think. Especially that girls tend to spread the idea that a one night stand is not a respectful concept and that they want to settle down with the love of their life as soon as possible. As a consequence, the guys say to themselves “yeah, so I’ll give her what she wants (a couple they think) so I can empty my balls at will” or they like to sleep with her and are also conditioned to want a couple so they believe they have “fallen in love” just because they feel some affection for their sexfriend.
The ideal for many emancipated girls, it would be to have a nice guy who fucks them correctly from time to time without pissing them off. And it seems quite complicated to find.
How can you make guys understand the type of relationship you wish?
1) Assume it directly and make it clear that you have several lovers.
I met a woman once who wrote directly on her profile on Adopt that she only wanted sex and that bad fuckers did not interest you. But you are not obliged to show that in public, you can say it in private conversation (at the beginning).
Then, it is especially necessary that you be firm on the fact that this type of relationship is exactly what you want at the moment : so you can see like that or can not meet up at all. Do not let any door open to hope. You can even talk to guys you frequent about some of your other accomplices, it will avoid that guy harbor illusions.
It is customary to say that men are looking for purity (it explains they try to make you a faithful wife), so if you assume your slut side (I say it lovingly) they will have less desire to engage and will be more excited about sex. Then, eventually comes the reputation problems, which brings me to the solution #2.
2) Change your hunting grounds.
For example, a field that women looking for good sex too often forget, but which is full of guys and couples who are only looking for sexfriend, it’s the libertine sites. With that, you will probably find your happiness not far from home, because single women are queens there. Talk a bit with the guys anyway to be sure they are good lovers (for that, we still did not invent better than the shit-tests). There’s not only old and ugly perverts on these sites, contrary to what one might think. The libertine spirit is based on respect and people there fully understand this kind of research!
3) Change your way of thinking and fucking
If the problem is that the guys fuck with you once and do not call after… or that they fuck you once but do not want to see you again if that is not clearly “serious” between you: it is perhaps that the deal to have you only for sex does not suit them. Either that comes from a blockage in their mind (oriented feminism) or you are not very good in bed (sorry). It is quite possible to turn on the guy to see you just for your ass or the way you fuck/suck only for the fleeting pleasure (that can make them forget their principles). Read up on the subject, see if you need to change something in the way you dress and train in the bed !!! This is very much a question of behavior, all that shit…
May the God of the Game be with you, beautiful ladies!
For the guys who still delude themselves:
4) I recommend this ebook to better understand women.
5) And this one to become a good lover.
May the God of the Game help us in this upside down world…