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Imperfection and seduction

imperfection seduction

Regularly, I am told that I am not credible as a seduction coach because my approaches are not ultra-alphas and I am not a sex bomb like Ian Somerhalder.


vagueonthehow from Tadcaster, York, England — Ian Somerhalder Uploaded by Anastasiarasputin

I think that these people did not understand that we should not look for perfection in seduction, a “perfect” game would look robotic…

Fuck the competition

A French woman has a lot of suitors, the competition is tough for the role of boyfriend, but it is much less for the role of “secret lover”. In other words, it is much easier, more practical and more enjoyable to become a lover than a boyfriend.

Trying to become very beautiful and very interesting to seduce women seems to me being counterproductive because it would require a lot of personal investment and would be the best way to become her next boyfriend or husband.

The problem is that the best guy on paper is not often the one who wins the game of seduction in real life. In fact, if you are wonderful on paper, she will probably make you wait longer before sleeping with you. It’s paradoxical, I know, but as you have made a strong impression, she will want to highlight her purity to try to keep you! In the meantime, you will still need to qualify with the risk of losing the deal at any time.

For others, those that women do not necessarily see as potential boyfriends, they see them more easily as occasional lovers and behave differently. This is exactly the effect we are looking for because once we have slept with, we can of course consider keeping the girl if the complicity is at the rendezvous. Because, yeah, it’s still paradoxical but a girl will more easily start a relationship with an average guy once he has fucked rather her than with a great guy who will sell himself for 3 months before getting laid and who may be bad in bed. The circle is complete !

If you liked this analysis, do not hesitate to read The (inconvenient) truth about gender relations ! And to be sure to fuck the women in a good way so that they want to see you again, I direct you to The awesome lover’s manual !


The pick-up artists are often criticized for flirting like robots and being clones. On the other hand, when I simply go to a woman to introduce myself and ask her number very directly, people think it’s a fake!

Yet, few people watched the video showing the evidence that followed my demonstration in SPU. It seems to reassure people to believe that we have to wait to be perfect to succeed in the street since it justifies the inaction of many of them…

But realize that if each approach was done in a humble and imperfect way, it would bring out the human side of things and pick-up artists would be much more popular. Exactly like with live concerts that often have more charm than perfect recordings: if the mp3s were so wonderful, no one would move their ass to hear their idol singing.

In addition, perfect people intimidate others and make them complex. That’s why I do not advise you to try to be perfect! Be careful though, this does not mean that you can do anything, ignore the basic rules of the pickup and that it must work every time. NO ! It just means that you do not need to realize the best approach in the world (and you should not even try) to seduce a girl.

You are not the hero of a romantic film and she is certainly not a princess!


drague parfaite

Do not think of yourself as a white knight thinking that you are doing something very original and courageous because it is the behavior of almost all men in our society today. In fact, those who put the woman on a pedestal from the beginning are not misunderstood romantics as they are led to believe but submissive sheep.

Accepting imperfection is courageous

When you expose yourself and make yourself vulnerable, you automatically subcommunicate the status of a confident man. So you should be proud of yourself, just for that!

And if you approach seriously but humbly, you communicate to the world “no matter the result, I assume and I fuck the negative look of tight-ass people.”

Maybe you will have a phone number, maybe not… but it does not matter because you know how to react in case of rejection if you saw my video about this subject. In any case, you will come out grown and stronger from this experience and I am sure you will be delighted to see that women will love you despite the fact that you did not approach them saying “he dies at the end of the book you’re reading” or “hello, I am the ideal man”. Really show who you are instead of repeating stupidly what some have told you to say. And never mind if they judge you imperfect. Perfection is in imperfection.

Do not forget that the best approach in the world can lead to a violent rejection and that the worst approach in the world can work. It all depends on who you fall on… it’s all about optimizing your chances. If there is a connection with the girl you are approaching and she is not closed-minded or feminazi, you can just go. Do your best, but do not worry too much and, if possible, do not hide behind the story of an impersonal and falsely original approach that you would have learned by heart.


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How to tell her that you love her: how can you tell a girl that you love her?

How to tell her that you love her

How to tell her that you love her

This is the kind of question I have to deal with even if I do not agree with the implicit starting assumption. Indeed, why should one at all costs SAY to a girl that he is LOVE with her ? Well, we’ll talk about that later…

Anyway, the best way to declare your love to a woman is certainly not the one you think… so read this article to the end at the risk of living quite a lot of violent disillusions!

1st case: you are sure you love her but you never made out with her

“How can I confess my feelings? ” If you think like this way, already, you’re wrong. Indeed, this sentence communicates that having feelings is a burden that must be hidden or got rid of at all costs. Considering romantic relationships like this might not take you very far.

Think a little : “I fulfill my DECLARATION of taxes, I ADMIT that it is me who broke the vase of the drawing-room, I CONFESS to the priest that I have already stolen some donuts in a store.” But passion speaks a completely different language and refuses ABSOLUTELY to be associated with a faulty behavior (it is already too often the case in our shitty society).

In our crappy cultures, we like to confess, whether in church or to a shrink. Because one can not confess without a third part who will decide between punishing or consoling, etc. The one with whom one confesses has an enormous power over him and at the same time one frees oneself from a weight, a part of responsibility, a secret. DO YOU UNDERGROUND THE PRESSURE THAT YOU CAN PUT THE GIRL UNDER?

Ultimately, going to a girl and telling her “I love you, do you want to make out with me?” can work 1 time out of 100 in high school or college, in the playground or in bad romantic comedies that only sell dreams to the basic idiots. But it works very rarely BECAUSE:
1) Someone who is uncomfortable with his own desires and sexuality to the point of confessing them as mistakes is not attractive.
2) The relation of judgment and the handing over of power to the hands of the other is the opposite of the fusional relationship that makes the basic chick dreams.
3) Girls want a game set, they want to be seduced before they are asked to answer “yes” or “no”.

Yeah, I understand, confession is often a cry of the heart, an expression of despair, a kind of ultimatum: we feel stuck, we do not know what to do… but, it is not attractive.

For many people who know nothing about love or relationships, the declaration of love is nevertheless a necessary passage to kiss or sleep with a girl. But this is completely wrong and is even often counterproductive.

The first thing to realize is that landing and saying to someone “hello, can I talk to you ? I love you”, well, it’s shit. Yeah, you secretly hope she’ll answer you “I love you too. Let’s make love.” BUT DON’T HOPE TOO MUCH!

This is actually the best way to be rejected violently. If you take the girl off guard and you are not especially a popular handsome boy of the chest… the chick is probably not in the same state of mind as you (or even do not know you) and is likely to send you to Hell just to get rid of the discomfort you have set up with this way of doing like a dumb guy.

The little sweet words that you pass in class are no better than the statement out of nowhere that we just talked about. But the worst is still the love letter of 18 pages… the writing, when it touches on love, it is a cowardly way of proceeding. Even if, I grant you, the simple fact of doing it requieres a lot of courage, the girl will not respect you for that. It’s unfair, but it’s life! Notice, all life lessons are good to take.

There is a tacit rule in relationships but that will increase your chances of success it’s to indirectly communicate that you are interested in a girl.

Indeed, people emotionally masters create a bond with the people they appreciate and try to make evolve the relationship rather than imposing brutal and unexpected decisions.

To finish, remove at all costs from your mind that there you need to love a girl to kiss or to sleep with her. If she likes you or if you are just at the right time at the right place taking the right initiatives, it’s enough for most. Sorry to break the myth and disappoint the fucking romantic.

2nd case: you are in a couple with her and wish to declare your love for her to make her understand that your relationship is serious

First of all: « Are you really in a couple? » This is the first question to ask. It’s not because you kissed a girl once or you slept with her at the end of a party that you’re a couple… again, I’m sorry to disappoint the pseudo-poets of my balls.

Imagine if for her you are just sexfriend and you start to put pressure on her by declaring your love to a girl who just wanted to have fun, she might say « well, fuck off, he’s going to become a pot of glue if he’s in love… » It can give rise to priceless situations like “I love you.
– Oh shit. Well, then I think it’s better not to see each other anymore.
– Snif, snif!”

Well, if you’re nevertheless sure to be really in a couple with the chick: do tell a woman you love her only when you’re 100/100 sure she thinks the same as you. To try to see more clearly in her state of mind: feel the ground, sound her, and so on.

Ah… and never before knowing her for at least 3 months.

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Phone game: how to give her an orgasm on the phone?

orgasm on the phone


Phone gameThe purpose of sleeping with the girl on the phone is to make her imagine that you make love together. But the human brain finds it difficult to differentiate between imagination and reality. I mean : by imagining you penetrating her or imagining her blowing you, she will feel positive emotions related to the sexual act and associate them with you.

You probably already know if you read me : a girl has sex more easily with a guy with whom she has already slept than with a stranger: practicing the sexual phone game will reduce the risk of encounter last minute resistances and will facilitate your fuckcloses .

But be careful, you cannot immediately address the subject of sex with a girl, you have to chat a little bit of everything and nothing before, so that she feels relaxed and at ease.

Then you’ll start asking her how she’s dressed, how’s the light, if she’s on her bed, if she’d like you to kiss her, and so on. If she gets into your game, then go farther and farther. Decrease the chances of blocking her by avoiding phrases such as “well, I’ll make you enjoy with my big dick!” Do not talk about things like sodomy before knowing if she likes this type of practice, at the risk of blocking her…

If you call the girl to speak to her orally, put everything in the tone of your voice to excite her. Suggest naughty things by whispering in her ear, etc.

If you want to warm her by SMS or Snapchat, use the writing to raise the temperature.

Here are some tips to write erotic texts (if you are lazy, you will find some texts ready to use to excite chicks in my ebook Secrets for seducing on the Internet).

And here I give you some tips for writing good sextos.

In any case, if you manage to make her come with your phone game, be aware that there is a good chance that she will agree to come directly to your house (or to make you come to her place) without having to go through the box “having a drink in town before”. This is a good way to take shortcuts!

Thanks to this technique, I often heard the same phrase coming back into the mouths of girls just before putting my dick in it : “Ah, this is the first time I’m in a guy’s bedoom in less than 3 minutes. Awesome, btw, your technique of approach, one has the impression to have already slept with you, to already know you in fact”.

In my Diary of a French PUA 2, you will find examples of conversations with girls where I have warmed them online with erotic texts to get them directly to my house and fuck them.

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Sexto example: 10 examples of good sextos you should send


Sexto example

Men and women under 30 love SMS. Many people would like to master the art of turning someone on with messages (it works for your target or your girlfriend). So I here will give you some examples of ready to use sextos !

Definition and origin

According to Wikipedia, “sexting” (also known as “textopornography” or “sextage”) is the act of sending sexually explicit texts or photographs… in French, we call it “sextos”. But, by extension, it can be said that one sends sextos when one warms someone on the dating apps.

The term appeared in 2005 in Australia in an article in The Daily Telegraph (Sunday magazine issue).


The phone call can sometimes be perceived as intrusive, while the e-mail is something more “professional”. The SMS, meanwhile, is a perfect compromise to discreetly excite a person.

Kinky texting is a good way to create and feed sexual tension. They are very useful: in the past, we used the letters of love… it is in fact an adaptation of a human need (writing is an awesome weapon of seduction) to new technologies.

The objectives of sextos

The goals of a sexto are to talk about your desires, to seduce, to arouse sexual arousal, to play and to strengthen the bond with the other. The point  is to sexualize the conversation and create some intimacy, a sexual complicity, between you two.

Another objective is to make the other person visualize the act. Indeed, know that if you have already slept on the phone with a girl, you will sleep more easily with her in real life.

How to write and send good sextos

It’s not always easy to send a good sexto. What to start with ? How do we know if we’re going too hard, too dirty? I will now give you tips to put all the odds on your side. Nevertheless, you must keep in mind that, this kind of thing, it happens or breaks (fortunately it happens more often than it breaks)…

Avoid nevertheless sending photos of your cock (let a certain mystery and frustrate a little bit the other one). But if you decide to do it anyway, make sure one cannot see your face and your cock on the same picture.

First, let it go, forget your inhibitions, feel the ground, be bold and go further and further. Do not send anything to a girl you hardly know… go ahead and see how she answers. Depending on her open-mindedness and responsiveness to your advances, you need to move a gear or take a little more time. Above all, avoid being too vulgar before knowing if she likes it: some prefer erotic sextos while others adore when it is downright pornographic… here is a perfect opportunity to disinhibit and test your sexual compatibility with the other!

Timing is also very important: try sending your messages at times when both of you are available to answer quickly. In fact, it is often necessary to “sextotate”, that is to say sending a series of sextos, to achieve a good degree of excitement.

Then, keep in mind that there is a huge difference between “writing sextos” and “sending sweet words”. I do not advise you to play it mushy (the goal is to turn her on) nor to be too salacious too fast (you don’t want to scare her). Nevertheless, you must be believed, sincere, frank, direct, etc. In short, do not try to make complicated innuendo… be explicit!

Finally, remember that even if the goal is to be direct and confident, you must always consider the desires, fantasies and preferences of your partner. It is useless to try to excite her by telling her that you would like to sodomize her on the coffee table of her living room if she does not like anal…

Examples of sextos

“I want you. Do you know what I would do if you were next to me?”

“I imagine your caresses and your tongue on my body… I  am becoming very hard.”

“I’ll take my shower, wanna come?”

“I’m very hungry, I could devour you entirely.”

“Think of something kinky and I’ll do it to you tonight. You have my word.”

“What color are your underwear?”

 “I want to put a good spanking on you. You excite me.”

“I’m naked in my bed… thinking about you and it makes me feel good.”

“Did you know I love to massage?”

“Do you remember when I licked you up to orgasm the other night?”

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What you should talk about to a girl

What you should talk about to a girl

What you should talk about to a girlWhat you should talk about to a girl…

Good topics :

They love subjects that relate to gender relations. If so many women look at The Young And The Restless, it’s for a reason.

Women also love subjects that concern mystery, magic, witchcraft, and so on.

Topics about fashion, clothing, perfumes… are also quite effective with women!

Topics to avoid :

Politics is a delicate subject in which everyone seeks to defend his point of view. Keep this topic aside to discuss it with your parents’ friends on Sunday afternoon.

Religion is a subject that does not create a link, it is a subject that is likely to lead you constantly to dead ends and does not bring anything in seduction.

Avoid at all costs talking about the exs (yours or hers), it is a subject that she normally reserves for her friends or her best friend. If she starts talking about her exs, cut off the conversation and show her signs of disinterest.

Never talk about your problems with girls. Talking about your problems with girls will devalue you and diminish your attraction capital… As a future PUA, you are supposed to have no problems with girls!

Avoid this kind of phrases: « it’s cool here don’t you find? ; Are okay ? ; How long have you been here? ; There’s a lot of people, huh? » This type of lambda phrases reflects a lack of confidence, as if you felt compelled to fill the silence so your target doesn’t escape.

Extract from “The basics of  seduction“…

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What can you say to a girl ?

What can you say to a girl

What can you say to a girl (or a woman) ?

What is interesting about a conversation with you is not the subject in itself but the way you approach it, the way you treat it. This is called originality. Paradoxically, to be original, start by being yourself. That is to say, talk about the things you like without headache. It is in the expression of your passions and interests that will emerge your natural freshness.

You’re not there to interview her so avoid all the questions like, « What are you doing in life? Where do you study ? Do you come here often ? Etc. » This is the kind of boring questions whose answer does not bring anything because basically you do not give a fuck. Moreover, all the men who have been here before you have surely asked her exactly the same questions. Instead of these unnecessary and boring questions, ask her questions that stimulate her imagination and make it possible to set up a kind of challenge.

To make her speak, imagine that each new encounter must give rise to a little story. The woman to whom you speak must always tell you her own. “Who ? When? What? Where ? How?”

You too have yours to tell. But you will have to listen to her story if you want to be listened to. Especially since her story will condition yours: one answers often to an anecdote by another one of the same type.

The next time you talk with someone, a colleague, a friend or a girl you meet, do not think about what you want to say, but focus on what he or she has say. Try and you’ll see that it will be fine!

Basic rules:

– Do not swear like a wagoner. In any case not, not before well knowing her;

– Be self-mocking about your body fat. It will make her laugh;

– Do not spend your time comparing her to your ex (or worse to your mother);

– Do not talk about yourself in the third person, except for humor;

– Do not put yourself at the center of all subjects as if everything was related to you;

– Show yourself interested when the woman speaks, offer her your active listening.

In your narratives and descriptions, always add emotion and sensory elements: describe what you see, feel, hear, etc. Never say anything to try to impress. Do not boast about your job, your money, your knowledge, your exs (!) or any other qualities (example: “I am a very protective man, I am super attentive and faithful, etc.”).

On the other hand, try to demonstrate your value via stories, storytelling. Tell an anecdote about yourself, which implies that you possess such and such quality, but remain implicit. If she feels that you are trying to impress her, your value will diminish in her eyes.

Always be cool, playful and fun. Seduction is a game, not something really important. The ideal of a conversation would be to mix up humor, teases and questions about something she likes. Bad taste is not necessarily to be proscribed, it is necessary to establish communication with the animal that is in both of you.

One of the best ways to seduce a woman is to talk like her. But the expression “speaking like her” does not mean adopting her facial mimics, nervous laughter, or shrill voice. Because I want to preserve your manhood, I propose a much less dangerous exercise. During your appointment, you will discuss many topics, but before giving your opinion on some of them, wait until she expresses herself and then resume her opinion on your account. This is a great way for a woman to feel understood. And who says woman understood, says woman conquered. A “I understand you so much” or a “I totally agree” would obviously not do the job : it is necessary to paraphrase.

Of course, it is not a question of stifling your personality, nor of silencing your opinions and of acquiescing to all that the lady says in front of you. “Talking like her” is a technique to use from time to time in conversation to create a real connection between you two.

When you wait a little before re-starting a subject and rephrase yherour words with your words, the woman in front of you will generally not understand that you are repeating her ideas solely in order to seduce her. She will even come to believe most of the time that she has found the rare pearl: a man who thinks like her and understands her…

Extract from “The basics of  seduction“…

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How to become freer and happier?

free and happy

How to become freer and happier

Do you really enjoy your personal freedom? Surely yes… yet most people live in what I call “collective conditioning,” based on fear. We interpret and judge reality as if we were looking through a fog.

It’s not pleasant, but you have to realize that we have not chosen what we know, what we believe and that our real choices are almost non-existent. Very few people are thus able, even only a little bit, to think for themselves. Let’s take for example the presidential elections: very few really read the programs of the candidates before making a choice. So their decision is based on what the media, the others, and so on, say. It is thanks to this “sheep effect” that one can guess the number of burglaries per year and the % that will be obtained by the different candidates: we are not free!

The way we see life is therefore conditioned by our education and by the surrounding culture: rules, habits, references… even our language is part of this process of domestication of man by bociety, because this is what permits its transmission and different interpretations.

This conditioning determines what we think possible or not and therefore often what we are capable of. In addition, limiting beliefs generally deprive us of joy and create unnecessary suffering (such as the pressure to “be beautiful” that make many young women suffer for the sole purpose of selling cosmetics).

The education we receive when we are children works because of the fear of punishment, of not being successful, of not being recognized, which will supposedly determine our degree of “adaptation” to society. When we are young, behaving the way our parents and teachers expected us to do made us no longer behaving as we really are. As a teenager, our view of the world has been shaped by the education received, and often, at the expense of ourselves and our true dreams. Yet, when we try to ignore these laws that guide us, we undergo the judgment of society, and that is what makes social pressure so powerful. Once an adult, the process is self-reproducing because of self-judging. We are very well trained!

Being ourselves without subjecting ourselves to the desires and judgments of society deeply tempts us, but scares us, even if we intend to respect the law and hurt nobody. By trying to meet the demands of society, we set ourselves goals that are impossible to achieve, we never judge ourselves up to the task and we try to hide it, we make ourselves unhappy by letting ourselves be lured by the masks that others wear: just have a look on Facebook where most people seem enjoying a dream life, and yet…

For reasons of conformism, or to silence our internal conflict (we conform VS we do what we want) we sometimes force ourselves to adopt very destructive behaviors, as a kind of self-punishment. Indeed, when we get drugged or drunk every week, we are our own tormentors. And society almost makes us proud of it.

This functioning leads most people to live their lives in complete fog, they are good little soldiers. Yet nothing forces us from the outside to be prisoners of conditioning. But, inside ourselves, we find many excuses to avoid a personal development work that would be liberating (or to don’t leave our comfort zone – it would put too much at stake). However, freedom belongs to us, we must be a little courageous to glimpse the light. Freedom consists in smiling at life, in exploring, in expressing ourselves, in living a little more in the present moment, without basing everything on the past and/or the future, in living naturally, in don’t giving a fuck…

Sex is a good example of negative conditioning: it’s in France like sorcery in Africa. It is omnipresent and concealed, trivialized and dramatized, full of prejudices but mysterious, publicly despised and appreciated in private. Yet sex can not be summed up in simple animal debauchery nor in the concept of fidelity: it can be lived as a form of sincerity, a search for truth, a conquest of freedom. Roughly, sex carries very different meanings for one or another but yet we can not assume it and live it as we want because of the doxa. It is a little bit « dissenting » in society and that is what makes us afraid. Fortunately, the community of seduction and personal development can help you reconcile with these instinctive but essential to our personal balance things!

I will now give you 4 keys to transform your life and relationships (these are the four Toltec agreements to which Don Miguel Ruiz devoted a book):

1 – Having an impeccable speech

It is through words that we express our thoughts, our emotions, our desires: what we are. It has a creative power of extreme power: this is our ability to verbalize things and thus to give them a consistency.

An impeccable speech, that is to say positive, will immunize us against the poison thrown by others. Thus, by taking care of our words, and thus remaining positive, we take care of our spirit, which will become a breeding ground for extraordinary things.

2 – Do not take everything personally

Whatever one may say to us as a wicked man, it can only affect us if we attach importance to it. We can very well choose to don’t take it into account, therefore, to don’t let ourselves be affected by this poison. That’s why you should never take a rejection personally, anyway, it can depend on so many things, so please don’t care.

If the others are programmed, conditioned, to judge, this is not our problem. Not entering this trap can protect from collective madness. Same thing when we judge: we only project our reality on others, especially when we try to be right at all costs. In truth, judgment concerns only the judge, not the judged.

Judgments about ourselves that are engendered by limiting beliefs can also trap us, especially when several contradictory beliefs lead us to inner conflict. That’s why we need to review one by one all our beliefs in order to live better.

3 – Do not make assumptions

It is our fear that leads us to don’t ask ourselves too many questions, to don’t check the thoughts that sprout in us, to follow the general movement without really raising our heads.

Also, we often imagine what others think, feel, we believe that everyone behave and thinks like us, and whenever it proves to be false, we experience a form of anger. This tendency that we have to attribute motives to others that they do not necessarily have prevents us from progressing along the path of freedom.

Thus, not making assumptions makes possible healthy and freer relations and communication, and freed from any unnecessary conflict. In addition, in pick-up, one can never know which girl will react positively nor which one will be a fucking aggressive bitch. So you have to become a philosopher to survive in such a jungle…

4 – Always do your best

Doing our best allows us to be able to change the height of the skipping bar, depending on our mood, our capabilities that can change from one moment to another. Doing one’s best is to never do too much but never to do not enought : thus, no self-judgment possible (one can not be blamed for having failed if he or she has done everything he or she could), no unnecessary energy loss. In seduction for example, one can be great one day and not have results the next day, but we do not care, because the essential is to try without bad spirit.

Doing your best improves our motivation to act without focusing on an immediate result, which increases our overall level of satisfaction. Doing one’s best allows us to evolve by accepting our limits, properly estimating our abilities, recognizing our mistakes and improving our awareness. Doing one’s best helps to avoid inaction and to pose the right action in the present moment, avoiding reference to the past and the suffering that may result from it. Doing one’s best is being able to be ourselves without any particular requirement, without having to conform.

Yeah, the community of seduction, it’s not just a gang of sex-starved assholes who want to fuck the maximum of chicks. We also think about life and about what can improve it: it is maybe why society in general does not really like us…

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The axioms of communication

The axioms of communicationFrom Wikipedia…

Watzlawick did extensive research on how communication is effected within families. Watzlawick defines five basic axioms in his theory on communication, popularly known as the “Interactional View”. The Interactional View is an interpretive theory drawing from the cybernetic tradition. The five axioms are necessary in order to have a functioning communication process and competence between two individuals or an entire family. When it comes to this theory, miscommunication happens because all of the communicators are not “speaking the same language”. This happens because people have different viewpoints of speaking. Its principles are cybernetic, its causality is of a circular, feedback nature, and, with information being its core element, it is concerned with the processes of communication within systems of the widest sense—and therefore also with human systems, e.g., families, large organizations and even international relations.

The communication within the “Interactional View” is based on what is happening, and not necessarily associated with who, when, where, or why it takes place. “Normal” as well as the “disturbed” family is studied in order to infer conditions conducive to the approach of interaction-orientation. It is believed that individual personality, character, and deviance are shaped by the individual’s relations with his fellows. Thus, symptoms, defenses, character structure and personality can be seen as terms describing the individual’s typical interactions which occur in response to a particular interpersonal context. The whole is more than the sum of its parts, and it is that whole in which we are interested.

Five basic axioms

The Interactional View requires a network of communication rules that govern a family homeostasis, which is the tacit collusion of family members to maintain the status quo. Even if the status quo is negative it can still be hard to change. Interactional theorists believe that we will fail to recognize this destructive resistance to change unless we understand Watzlawick’s axioms. The following axioms can explain how miscommunication can occur if all the communicators are not on the same page. If one of these axioms is somehow disturbed, communication might fail. All of these axioms are derived from the work of Gregory Bateson, much of which is collected in Steps to an Ecology of Mind (1972).

Watzlawick, Bavelas, and Jackson support these axioms to maintain family homeostatis.

One cannot not communicate: Every behavior is a form of communication. Because behavior does not have a counterpart (there is no anti-behavior), it is impossible not to communicate. Even if communication is being avoided (such as the unconscious use of non-verbals or symptom strategy), that is a form of communication. “Symptom strategy” is ascribing our silence to something beyond our control and makes no communication impossible. Examples of symptom strategy are sleepiness, headaches, and drunkenness. Even facial expressions, digital communication, and being silent can be analyzed as communication by a receiver.

Every communication has a content and relationship aspect such that the latter classifies the former and is therefore a metacommunication: All communication includes, apart from the plain meaning of words, more information. This information is based on how the speaker wants to be understood and how he himself sees his relation to the receiver of information. Relationship is the command part of the message or how it is non-verbally said. Content is the report or what is said verbally. Being able to interpret both of these aspects is essential in understanding something that a communicator said. The relational aspect of interaction is known as metacommunication. Metacommunication is communication about communication. Relationship messages are always the most important element in communication.

The nature of a relationship is dependent on the punctuation of the partners communication procedures: Both the sender and the receiver of information structure the communication flow differently and therefore interpret their own behavior during communicating as merely a reaction on the other’s behavior (i.e., every partner thinks the other one is the cause of a specific behavior). To punctuate a communication means to interpret an ongoing sequence of events by labeling one event as the cause and the following event as the response. In a situation with communication, if one thing happens, something else always happens. For example, a female in a relationship with a male is feeling depressed. The male in the relationship with the female feels guilty. One who observes this situation might ask, “Is she depressed because of his guilt, or does he feel guilty because of her depression?”

Human communication involves both digital and analog modalities: This axiom refers back to the use of non-verbals and system strategy explained in the first axiom. It is mostly related to the digital content of communication within a relationship.

Inter-human communication procedures are either symmetric or complementary: This axiom focuses on metacommunication with two main components called symmetrical interchange and complementary interchange. Symmetrical interchange is an interaction based on equal power between communicators. In accordance to that, complementary interchange is an interaction based on differences in power. Within these two interchanges there are three different ways they can be used: one-up, one-down, and one-across. With a one-up communication, one communicator attempts to gain control of an exchange by dominating the overall communication. A one-down communication has the opposite effect. A communicator attempts to yield control of an interaction or submit to someone. The final message is a one-across communication. This communication moves to neutralize a situation. This is also called transitory if only one communicator is attempting this style. When two communicators use the same style of one-up, one-down, or one-across, it is symmetrical. If they are opposing one another it is complementary. This axiom allows us to understand how an interaction can be perceived by the styles a communicator is using.

Additional notions

Some interrelated notions that make up the Interactional View promoted by Watzlawick and colleagues at the MRI include:

One cannot not communicate, and the related idea that one cannot not influence;

Understanding behavior as if we are constantly exchanging messages defining the nature of relationships of which we are a part;

Shifting focus of attention from intent to the effects of behavior as communication;

Observer-imposed punctuation;

Emphasizing the vital role of the therapist’s preconceptions in bringing forth socially constructed reality;

Investing the ramifications of self-fulfilling prophecy; and

Articulating and fully embracing the “as If” nature of behavior.

A term that is used often in the theory of the Interactional View is enabler. An enabler is within addiction culture; a person whose non-assertive behavior allows others to continue in their substance abuse. An example of this would be a person letting their sibling continue to act in an immature manner because that is what the family is used to him doing.

Another word frequently used in the Interactional View is double-bind. Someone in a double-bind, is a person trapped by expectations; the powerful party requests that the low-power party act symmetrically. An example of this would be a person asking another person, “Why didn’t you like the movie?” or “You like rock ‘n’ roll, don’t you?” The first person is asking the second person to act in a way that is similar (symmentrical) to them.

Extract from : Communication, seduction and manipulation

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Improve communication with yourself

Improve communication with yourselfIn this ebook, I will teach you communication techniques simple to use but nevertheless very powerful. They will enable you to improve, in a considerable and lasting way, not only your relations in all fields, social circle, friendly, family, professional life, etc. But all your daily life!

Man or woman, you will improve your communication, you will discover how to better understand the other and better be understood and you will become more confident.

My mission, if you accept it, will be to accompany you through this book in a benevolent way towards the improvement of all your communication skills (communicatation with yourself and with others). Once familiar with these techniques, they will naturally be part into your communication which will be of better quality.

After reading this ebook, you may be surprised to see how your worldview has become more positive through better internal communication. You may be surprised to find that “you cannot not communicate” : you will be more motivated to learn how to communicate as effectively as possible!

The first person with whom you are in contact is yourself.

I suggest in this section tips to improve the relationship you have with yourself! This is the most important of all!

Change your perspective on “failure”

Like most people, you have certainly gone through storms and suffered setbacks, which you call “failures” in your life. Besides, if it were not the case… it would be a serious problem! It would mean that you have never taken any risks and that your life is very boring (or that you have been overprotected)…

But you probably do not give the same meaning as I do to the word “failure”.

I think that failure in the sense of irremediable defeat does not exist, that failure is only an absence of temporary success. Succeeding, the first time, without being taught, would be a miracle.

The only real failures, in my opinion, would be to continuously reproduce the same behaviors that lead you now (and will still lead you, if you persevere) to a state of dissatisfaction. And giving up before getting the expected results.

Your mistakes are valuable lessons if you take them into consideration. If a way of doing things or even thinking does not bring you the desired results, why not change them? This can be as simple as that… if you decide it (and if you bother to identify the error to address it).

If you’re shaking yourself secretly by thinking of someone, being reluctant to dating sites or going to a club without ever approaching and waiting for it to fall off you all cooked in your mouth does not give you the sex life you want… Then you can open your mind and discover that there are other ways to see things that are surely more productive.

You should also know that it is not because life has refused you something at a given moment that this refusal is definitive.

It’s not because a pretty girl (or a handsome boy, once and for all) has rejected you or refused to kiss you in a club that you will never kiss pretty girls. Unless you give up, unless you act and decide knowingly to continue to act in spite of common sense. Some people are very stubborn: they prefer to continue to fail “in their own way” rather than to succeed by following the advice of a caring person. I find it really a shame… but everyone does as he wants! It’s up to you to see if you prefer to sponsor the distributors of condoms or those of handkerchiefs.

Admitting failures does not mean that you will not free yourself: it is one more step on the road to victory. It is above all the acceptance of the fact that you are not perfect, which is a testimony of humility and intelligence. Finally, it is proof that you are looking to improve your life rather than to correct it. The nuance is subtle but very important!

Believe that you are successful

To achieve your goal, you must free yourself from your doubts, your fears and be certain that you will succeed for sure in what you plan (or act as you were : remember the teachings of Pascal “Kneel, faith will come”).

Before I had my blog Diary of a French PUA, I was holding another blog called “Cyprine Rain”. And even before that, when I was a beginner, I had created a blog named Le Coin Seduction.

I was not yet a Pick-Up Artist at this moment, far from it, but holding a blog and introducing myself to people like a guy who is good with women and who assumes to want to improve has pushed me to excel. It also allowed me to have very constructive discussions with some members of the fair sex because they like to talk about gender relations with an open-minded guy…

I had to be congruent, I had to act as if I was a PUA, so I decided to act as if I was already a “womanizer” with the guys with whom I was going out and the girls I was hooking up. It compelled myself to give the best of myself because I was committed to myself and to others! This is certainly what has accelerated my training because, after two years, I already fucked at least 2 new babes each month. And a few years later, I do more than 4 monthly on average…

Note that I still had some cool love stories that lasted as well. I did not just bang and leave, I have already built relationships with the girls met.

Distinguish wishes and goals

“I’d like to go to a swinger club with my sexfriend…”
“I plan to make a threesome with two girls…”
“I’d like to kiss more women when I go out…”

Do people who say that make a decision or are they merely expressing a wish, basically hoping that others or “life” will do what is necessary for them?

Consider the fact that life is a perpetual change. “We never bathe twice in the same river” (this was Heraclitus). Think of being flexible enough to succeed more: it will be worth slightly modifying your trajectory when it will be necessary (after taking into account the new elements you have) rather than mechanically follow a road that has become obsolete.

Today, you may be aiming to be a Don Juan but perhaps after having fucked 10 chicks, you will decide to be a couple with a nice chick. Or perhaps you enter the game to find a girlfriend, but once launched in a dynamic of success, you will ultimately opt to make a maximum of experiences and fuck a lot of chicks.

Also set yourself realistic goals to get started and do not compare yourself to others. If you dream of kissing 100 women in 2 years, starting from nothing, and doing only street pickup… it seems very difficult. Already begin by setting yourself the goal of losing your virginity. Do not put the car before the horse : keep in mind your ultimate goal and mark your way of sub-objectives which will be as many mini-victories.

You want to fuck 100 women, you already good, you are determined not to put be a couple… it is possible. This ambitious goal can only motivate you. Oscar Wilde did not say “We must always aim at the moon, because even in case of failure, we land in the stars”? But start by kissing girls in clubs before forming such projects!

A true decision excludes any other possibility. And by giving a realistic dimension to your goal, you multiply your chances of reaching it again because you are less likely to be discouraged. So, once your goal is determined, go for it! And change your plan only if you sincerely think it is for the best (it is with your conscience that you must decide it).

By the way, do not hesitate to read my article on the first year of pick-up and learning curve.

It is done ? Good. Now I have to ask you a question: what difference do you make exactly between looking for solutions and wanting to achieve an objective?

Seriously, ask yourself the right questions as long as there is still time. Why do not you already have the sexual life you want in the depths of you? It may be more “comfortable” for you now to tell yourself that “you’ll be dealing with the seduction problem later, now you have other priorities.”

Dodging is a painless solution, but only in the short term. One day you may wake up old and alone, or (worse) married to a chick you do not really like. And then, it will be really serious. Especially as you may no longer be able to get hard without viagra.

It will REALLY be dramatic because there will be nothing else that you can do. Except maybe going to prostitutes from time to time.

You then may think that you should have taken your responsibilities when it was time and start a personal development process to have a woman you really want by your side. This is the trap of procrastination…

But we are not there yet, do not foresee the worst. You still have the choice:



Look in the right direction

Look where you want to go instead of what you want to avoid! To do this, formulate your objective in positive terms, by removing the negation, in favor of the affirmation.

The right hemisphere of your brain works like a young nymphomaniac in the sense that it is always focused on immediate pleasure and ignores negation. Therefore, the unconscious ignores the “no” and receives each word as a direct suggestion. In a way, as an order, which he will most often transform into action, as, for example, a modification of your feelings.

If you think or verbalize: “I do not want to lack self-confidence,” your unconscious will only remember “lack of self-confidence” and may even understand “I want to lack confidence.” So do me a favor: you will decide that from now on, you will overflow with confidence!

Similarly, if you say “I no longer want to be a loser,” your brain will understand that you are a loser. Make the choice to use affirmative phrases in preference to all others (when you talk to people but also when you speak to yourself), to change your worldview and make it more positive.

Do not say “I do not want to be a loser with the chicks”, prefer “I want to be a winner”.

When I did not dare to hook up girls then quickly sexualize with them, it is likely that my attention was more focused on what I feared than on what I aspired to. I thought I would avoid sources of pain (like rejections, questioning myself and asking disturbing but useful and energizing questions, taking the trouble to think a little for myself).

I surely found a form of pleasure in my shitty sex life : I somewhat enjoyed, like most of my friends at the time, this victim status. Apparently comfortable status of the guy who complains that the chicks do not understand anything and to whom people boost the morale but that does not act in the good sense for things to change.

“Therapy is a fight where your opponent dreams that you win and where he will do anything to stop you,” said Milton Erickson (the father of Ericksonian hypnosis – a flexible, indirect and non-dirigiste approach to hypnosis that gave birth to many modern methods of psychotherapy.) I find it fair enough.

Are you tempted to stay at home and masturbate rather than go out picking up chicks with your friends? Get out! Such avoidance behaviors favor short-term “pleasure” (in this case the absence of effort that would result from the confrontation of one’s fear) to the detriment of short-term “pain” (taking action and facing your fear) that would bring you a REAL long-term pleasure (coming in a hot and humid vagina or spending a good moment on the field and being proud of the efforts accomplished).

Many people are in this case (I call it “ease”). But the thing is that the more you repeat a behavior and the more it anchors: inaction with women and complaints because of poor sexuality become the definition of a normal life.

If you really cannot project yourself positively, then try to live simply the moment. Tell yourself that the past no longer exists and do not try to imagine the future. At the moment, you want to talk with a chick, so go for it! That’s it ! This approach may seem simplistic but it will necessarily work as well as the other for some of my readers.

Whatever you do, the important thing is to know yourself and be at peace with yourself.


Understand your own motivations

If you want to “no longer masturbate”, your motivations can be to get rid of an addiction, to find the sexual urge to go out hunting, to save your stock of handkerchiefs, and so on.

The more motivations you have, the more “good reasons” you want to reach your goal!

So, what are your motivations for learning pickup/seduction?

And most importantly, what is your real purpose?

Seriously, take a paper and pen, and write down your current goal. What is your objective, in fact?

Now draw two columns:

Why would you want to learn seduction?

What is stopping you?

I am pretty sure that there are far fewer con arguments in your list than arguments pro the practice of pick-up. Also ask yourself if all the “con” arguments you have found are good faith. It’s up to you to see what you’re doing…


Use visualization

The unconscious does not differentiate between a real situation and a scene created by your imagination. Mentally projecting yourself into a “probable” future will help you.

Close your eyes for a moment and imagine yourself in the future, once your goal is reached… Water has flowed under the bridges and you now enjoy the new living conditions you dreamed of.

What is different from before, more positive and better for you? What makes your daily life easier and more enjoyable? Be attentive to everything around you, details, perfumes, colors… So maybe you will be able to instantly change your internal state, that is to say, how you feel and consequently you will already know what to expect if you get started! This should motivate you to move your ass!

You can also use another type of projection, in the shorter term: imagine yourself kissing or undressing a chick before approaching her… then REALLY talk to her. You will be in a much more sexual state and go here much more as a winner than if you were torturing yourself by imagining various scenarios, which will help you. It may sound stupid, but what you communicate unconsciously will be better. Thank you, positive visualization!


Become aware of the impact of your limiting beliefs

Beliefs are your definite convictions and beliefs about life, they are “gospel words” that you would not think for a moment to question… because, for you, “it goes without saying!”

Your beliefs can be helpful, that is to say, positive and good for you. For example, if you believe you are an attractive person, then you allow your unconscious to see the opportunities with the chicks around you.

If, on the contrary, you have limiting beliefs, such as believing that “girls cannot be interested in a guy like you,” then you probably will not even see half of the opportunities you’ll have under your nose !

It is the eternal struggle: “She is looking at me? She surely likes me” against “She is looking at me, she must have seen my pimple on the nose and find it ugly”. One way of seeing life is more constructive than the other… you will easily agree!

Consequently, being attractive, it is not always something acquired, it is a way of being and especially a state of mind.

Some people were the hotties of the college and we confident because the chicks were liking them. Then, in adulthood, they became ugly (they got badly aged) but they never doubted that they were seductive so they continued to live in this “reality” (your reality is defined by all of your beliefs). And, often, they are still getting hot chicks into adulthood thanks to their state of mind.

What counts is not how things really are because no one has access to reality as it is. Since there is always some good in the bad and vice versa, it is better to choose to believe what suits you as long as it is congruent with the society in which you are moving.

Indeed, some of your beliefs are unique to you and others are shared by the people who live with you (a guy who puts his hands in the ass of girls in the subway will be arrested for sexual harassment even if he is convinced that it is perfectly “normal” to do so… By the way, what does “normal” mean for you, what is normality?

Let’s take the example of someone who does not assert himself. You “calibrate” (in other words, you observe) various external signs that testify to the low esteem that this person has for herself. She is awkward and is not yet able to express her views in a conversation especially when it is to contradict the dominant opinion.

By the way, this person has certainly not always had this poor image of herself: how did it come about? Everyone has a story… But at some point in her life, the person in our example was probably convinced one way or another that he is a shit and that his opinion has no value… And now she walks with this belief and probably complains to her shrink. It is enough to speak of one thing, if only to think about it, to give it existence…

Beliefs, in this case limiting, alter the map of the world of the individual, who behaves like the one he believes to be. And it makes suffer all those people who have not been initiated in our techniques and who do not understand why they suffer because they can not question their reality (unless perhaps if they take a big slap in the mouth).

If you believe that one does not “approach like that” or “one doesn’t fuck a girl this way in real life” then it will not happen to you to practice doggy style because your reality (here composed of your limiting beliefs) excludes this possibility.

If, on the contrary, you think it is possible to pick a chick up in the street then to kiss her during the first date, then it becomes possible. Myself, I was skeptical at first, but I got there, so I’ve come a long way (and in a good way) since I started. You have to work on yourself to open your mind and change what is wrong.

While the unconscious often builds against yourself beliefs that limit you, you can consciously create beliefs that will help you. But before conceiving a helping belief, you will have to free yourself from the opposite belief. Take the example of a handsome guy who wants to go out with a girl but does not dare to ask her. Before issuing his request, he must have the confidence to take the act and feel deserving enough to get what he is about to ask. You probably know that happiness is no easier to accept than misery (it is paradoxically difficult to get out of the shit, see the number of winners of the lottery that became crazy…) If we bring it back to the pick-up: if you do not dare to try your luck with a chick, it’s because you do not have enough confidence in yourself/you do not think you deserve it/you like to complain about not fucking the girls you want (that’s why you accept this situation and do not do anything concrete to change it).

The time has come to separate you from your limiting beliefs, these profound convictions of not being up to the task, of not being able, of not deserving, of being inevitably a prisoner of fate, of not being a good person… If your problem is that you always go out with troubled girls, know that the unconscious neuroses attract: by solving part of your problems, you will probably have more balanced partners! It’s the icing on the chest! If you still miss something, a kind of click: I simply suggest you to provoke it. Look for the key actively, whether in books or in others, by observing and questioning those who have already achieved what you are aiming for (find the teacher who inspires you the most to learn the most easily). This is largely what my blog, my ebooks and coaching are all about. Hopefully it will unlock you!


Use affirmative turn of phrases and references

Imagine that your goal is to be sociable and relaxed in the presence of unknowns.

Considering that a belief is a profound conviction that one would not think for a moment to question because it is obvious, you are not going to express a hypothesis… but an affirmation like :

“I am sociable and relaxed, everywhere, at every moment and with everyone.”

Here is my list of personal statements (focus on the list of affirmations not on the “what to do/what not to do” lists):

I wrote this list of affirmations so that you became more and more confident. It may not be suitable for your needs.

So, not only read yours, but FEEL IT (visualization) daily until you notice a positive change in your behaviors. Personally, the list has been posted in my room for over a year and helped me get out of a dirty depression. Moreover, it intrigued the people who came to my house and once again compelled me to assume my interest in seduction.

As for those that made fuck of it, I fucked them in the ass! Just kidding.

Do not hesitate to really work on yourself to communicate the best because the emotions are contagious (the emotional contagion or emotional contagion is the transfer of the emotions of an emitting person towards a recipient, it must be distinguished from the empathy). What to remember is that if you are really comfortable with sex, then the girls you meet will be more often.

As proof that the more normal things seem to us, the more people around us will find it normal too, go read this field report where I tell how I infiltrated in a high school at the request of a girl under the guise of a young teacher so she sucks me (it was her fantasy). My secret for not being unmasked? I only did “as if it was normal for me” to go to high school by the entrance of the teachers… and nobody asked me any question.


Internal state and external state

Many of us know that our emotions and our internal state have repercussions on our body (somatization is called it). However, many do not know that the reverse is also possible.

You will understand: by changing your physical attitude (for example: having your shoulders cleared, smiling rather than heading, standing straight and holding your head up rather than lowering it and holding like a old man, changing your breathing rhythm and adopting the one of the days of victory) you will be likely to instantly find the internal state associated with this physical attitude. By applying yourself, to this work you will then release good sensations and will be more attractive.

The more you repeat a behavior (good or bad for you, no matter…) the more this behavior becomes anchored. The fact of being aware of the unhealthy nature of a behavior or of being aware of the limiting beliefs underlying is not always sufficient to free yourself from it.

But the opposite is also possible, namely that the less you repeat a behavior and the more it tends to disappear.

Habit, repetition, will be an asset if the behavior is positive but will be a constraint if it is bad for the individual.

If you make it a habit to try your luck with women, then it will be an asset. On the other hand, if you’re used to act shy in front of women and then add them on Facebook to try to pick them up, this behavior will be bad (except if she really liked you when she saw you, she will think you are a coward and will make fun of you with her girlfriends (I caricature but it is so that you understand better)).

Success with women is a question of communication, certainly, but also of dynamics. I’m serious. There were times when I was awesome, where I succeeded in great things regularly and others where I did not have too much energy and where I had more problems (often after a break in my game). So get into the habit, if you can, do not stop your learning (the seduction is not quite like the bike). Especially at the beginning!


The principle of positive intention

The idea here is that “every thing is here for a reason even if one does not always understand it.”

Given the fact that you will never really know what the interlocutor thinks, so much attributing to him the benefit of the doubt, or better, good intentions. You will see that you will be much less stressed.

Let’s imagine that your girlfriend does not seem happy to see that you are coming back from work earlier than usual. You may be disappointed with her reaction (and even imagining that she was waiting for her lover), blaming her for pouting and reminding her that she regularly complains that you are coming back late… or you can choose to think that this is just a personal impression and that it is perhaps not, in fact, the reality.

Finally, if you persist in believing that she is not satisfied (because of rather objective elements) because you are coming back earlier than usual from work, you may consider that she had perhaps a positive intention: Maybe she had planned to dress sexy and get pretty for you but did not have enough time…

The best way to get closer to “real reality”, or at least to avoid moving away from it, is to rely solely on concrete, objective and observable facts.

By doing so, it is becoming more and more frequent that many of our points of view are the result of interpretations (sometimes even of our imagination) and are therefore not very objective.

Frankly, when you never know what to believe, why not choosing to believe what makes you feel ?

Everything is a matter of reality in life. I am personally suspicious of absolutes, of very clear opinions. Few things are really black or white, often they are gray.

So it would be necessary to respect the points of view of other people and avoid for example to say “she is ugly” and instead to say “I do not like her”… which is probably more correct and less hurtful.

Similarly, for people who believe in God, then God exists. Maybe only in their heads (who know ?) but it impacts their lives so it exists. No doubt about it! That’s why I respect all religions (but I deviated from my purpose).



In neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), it is posited that the relation to the external world necessarily passes through at least one of the five senses. They are called “sensory channels” (or VAKOG, acronym for: “Visual, Auditive, Kinesthetic, Olfactive, Gustative”).

A person who favors the sense of sight is called “visual” to organize his or her experience and communicate. He finds his memories by the visual impression that he has of them and expresses himself with a vocabulary linked to the vision. For example, a person who often uses formulas such as “I imagine that” or “I can see that” and finally “It’s clear” is probably a visual one.

Someone called “auditory” favors auditory perceptions to organize and access his experience. Someone who favors the ear canal will gladly associate a telephone number with a catchphrase for example. It uses a vocabulary of auditory register, using, for example, vocabularies such as “I hear well” or “what you’re telling me echoes”.

The kinesthetic refers to the touch but also to all the feeling that one can feel by the body. In this sense, olfactory and taste are often treated as kinesthetic, although the specific vocabularies may be very different. Kinesthetic people are those who generally use their physical feelings (movements, postures, balances) to organize and access their experience.

The preferred vocabulary then refers to these areas: “Keep your feet on the ground”, “It is a headache” or “This example is striking! “, “It’s all good !” or “He is not renowned for the odour of sanctity”.

Each channel functions as a perceptual filter linked to the storage. Over time, one person favors one or even two of these five senses. Each individual has a privileged mode of communication and his way of expressing himself reflects this state.

According to NLP, there is no good or bad channel. It is enough to take into account the channel that your interlocutor favors and to agree to improve communication and then, if necessary, to guide him to another channel, to invite him to develop his other capacities or to integrate new strategies.

And you, what category do you think you belong to?


Tips for all your problems in the future

Let’s define a “problem” as a gap between the desired situation and the actual situation.

Know that “a well-stated is a problem half solved” (Charles Kettering).

Note also that “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it” (Einstein) and that “A problem without solution is a badly stated problem” (Albert).

Key issues in problem solving include:
– Solving a problem is primarily a matter of mindset (will you look if you can solve the problem or HOW will you solve it?);
– Solving a problem involves using a clear and detailed methodology;
– Solving a problem means taking the time necessary to define it properly.

For example: Freud wondered “What do women want?”. For us, the question becomes “How to make them react positively?”

And, the answer to this question is more than detailed on my blog.

Solving a problem, as we have seen, it is above all to change from an undesired situation A to a desired situation B. It is a process of change management… and as a result, we are almost always confronted with paradigms, resistances to change. Most often, stuff like:
– “I do not want to know, I should change everything…”
– “I’ve always done like that so I do not see myself changing…”
– “Why bothering to improve my life, there is no dead man in the current state of things…”

No, there’s no man dead, but there are no women orgasms either! So try to identify and defuse your own resistance to change!


Improve communication with others

We are naturally “on the same wavelength” with the people we enjoy the company.

For a variety of reasons, it happens that “there is no love lost” with some of the individuals we meet but for some reason we sometimes have to relate to them (of course you are not obliged to WELL COMMUNICATE all the time with everyone). For example, a client or a co-worker who does not share the same opinions as us, a member of our family, a girl we would like to seduce, and more generally a person with whom the contact is an interest.

Extract from : Communication, seduction and manipulation

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7 tricks of manipulation and persuasion

7 tricks of manipulation and persuasion

7 tricks of manipulation and persuasionIn this article, I reveal 7 tricks of manipulation and persuasion… concrete and easy to use!

1) It is important to always make sure that the other person feels like the idea comes from her (especially if you have sown the seeds in her mind upstream). So she will less resist, and it is important in seduction because women sometimes tend to feel guilty when it’s time to let it go.

For example:
SHE : “Are we going to your house?”
HE : If you want”
(instead of answering “yes” directly).

2) If I ask you not to think about the green color, you will imagine it (the unconscious has trouble with negation). Also, do not imagine the pretty little breasts of a naked woman in front of you, who bites her lips. Don’t lie, you did imagine, right ? You can easily make people imagine things…

Imagine now that by telling stories (about you or others), you can make your interlocutors feel emotions. Well, that’s exactly what you can do by incorporating patterns into your storytellings.

Thus, you will stimulate the excitement and emotions of women. And, emotions really govern decision-making, rather than logic. That is why we can get women to do things that they would not think they would do if they were simply using the logical part of their brains.

3) According to many studies, the touch (called “kino” in the community of seduction) allows to increase the rate of acceptance of a request. By touching women on the forearm or on the shoulder, you can leave them a better impression, you can seem more fun, and so on.

It is rather easy to do and people are very rarely offended by a touch on the “social parts” of the body.

4) Giving a reason also increases the acceptance rate of a request. For example, “kiss me, it’s my birthday”. And it works also if you give a shitty reason like “kiss me because I want to”.

People accept a request more easily when it seems to them that it is justified!

5) You can use cold reading (finding out information about an individual through observation of his or her reactions, and an inaccurate line of questioning to quickly identify his or her needs or thoughts) or magic tricks, chicks like it. It fascinates them and it is therefore a demonstration of high value. But these are things that are difficult to master.

Fortunately, there are phrases in which most people recognize themselves (it’s called the Barnum effect, that’s what horoscopes are based on). Using them in a conversation with a woman will allow you to appear more alpha and will give you a mystical aura.

6) In most people, flattery has a positive impact even when it is not sincere or when it is exaggerated. Besides, if it’s really a lack of respect, kinda “you have beautiful eyes” to a blind woman.

7) Similarity, commonalities (real or invented) create a link. Mirroring (synchronisation) with people too. This is something naturally done by people when they are close… but thanks to these techniques, so by forcing the feeling, you can increase your success rate.

These little tricks, if you adopt them, will have a positive impact on your success rate.

For more information about communication, seduction (seduction is a lot about communication), manipulation, NLP, dark seduction, persuasion, influence, psychology, etc. : you can read my ebook « Communication, seduction and manipulation ».

To finish, choose a number between 1 and 4.

It is done ?

Well, chances are you chose 3.

Now choose a number between 1 and 10.

It is done ?

Well, you have probably chosen the number 7, like most people (the 1 is often chosen too).

Well, see you soon!