Today I wanna explain what I think of this question that some chicks ask “what kind of relationship are you looking for?” They ask it to me especially on the Internet, but I’ve also read it by texts after taking a number and heard in bars before going home.
It’s behind the question:
In general, the chicks who ask this question want to hear “something serious”. They want to feel reassured about the intentions of the guy and feel good. So only the victims of social pressure need it.
There is however a minority of girls who will next you if you start playing the “good guy” because they know very well that it is surely a lie. They appreciate honesty, and I I like them for their non-naivety. That said, if you were really sincere while saying that having sex with you would engage her in a serious relationship, they will surely next youanyway because they probably do not want a spineless wimp.
In my case, most of the time this shitty question ends the interaction. I do not like hearing platitudes like that. A girl who does not think for herself and does not see where her interest is make me flee. Especially because they often say “serious or SEXFRIEND (like it’s dirty vade retro one night stand)!”
Your reasoning:
Most guys make the following reasoning:
– If I say “sex” and that she does not want to hear this … she will next me
– If I say “sex” and that’s what she wants too … we take a shortcut
– If I say “serious” and that she wants it too… I’ll see her but it will be hard
– If I say “serious” and she wants to hear “sex”… we lose a lot of a time in the better or a good sex session
Lots of guys are trying to play it “romantic” but actually just want to fuck chicks. Which continues the tradition of the assholes.
Oh yeah, the lambda guys thinking they are very original, tend to write a long tirade to impress the girl, a pompous thing to clear themselves of the terrible label “pig who wants sex.” They do not assume their role. Result: a corny praline answer that stinks like a lie. But they do not want that either (except single-minded doves). If we talk of commitment after three mails, we risk scaring them off (except the foolish ones).
My advice is : don’t worry about losing an opportunity: above all, do not take a headache. Answer what you want to offer her, and next it she it is not happy with that. In the worst case, too bad for her if she prefers being alone and frustrated waiting the Charming Principle rather than fucking a good lover without consequence. It is by doing this that many women will never experience the true pleasure. But is it your problem since there are many other women less pain in the ass with their insecurity that will burn them priority with guys?
Why this is a ridiculous question:
It’s one of the questions that come up most often in the mouths of girls (more than my dick), and yet I find that it makes no sense. Or at least, it only shows the narrow-mindedness of those who ask.
Women do not realize that by eliminating systematically those who answer “I just want to have fun”, they actually miss meeting interesting people and goods guys.
Indeed, it is not because we are looking at first for a sexfriend that we are not a good person. And I have often seen one-night stands turn into a serious relationship. It even happened to me several times. But it is by choice, not by constraint, because we would commit to long-term in exchange of 10 minutes penetration.
I refuse to categorize my meetings because that would erase all the shades and all the magic that offer meetings. In my view, the dichotomy between sexfriends and serious relationship does not really exist, it’s much more subtle, Love. We can sleep with a girl at the first night without question and end up married to her two years later. While we did not envisage anything “serious” at the beginning… It even seems more sincere than signing a contract on the Internet even before having “tried” her.
Conversely, we can very well think during the first date that the person is made for us but realize a month later that it is not at all the case. We then lost time and have a drag on the foot. Simply, do simple: do not ask that kind of question too quickly and allow the interaction to evolve naturally.
Nevertheless possible answers:
“I let it be and see how it’s changing …”
“I do not take a headache. ”
“Why cutting corners? ”
” Isn’t a funny relationship better than a serious relationship? ”
“It is not decided in advance, a relationship is not a contract: it is depending on a lot of factors we do not control. But the idea is : I’m open to everything…”
“I take what life gives me.”