Unless you are in a relationship established for ages, and yet, you will not be THE fundamental condition for the proper functioning of your girlfriend’s life. The one that will try to make you believe otherwise is a girl with a lot of problems, and girls with problems: you do not want them.
In my discussions and my encounters with girls, I often found this common thing: they like to find a little chaotic guys to get them back on track. The hero syndrome version girl, their desire to do something good for a hopeless case. If girls like bad boys, that’s for their impulsive and dangerous side, certainly, but also because they have the secret hope that one day they will manage to change them.
In our case, guys, this syndrome results in our attraction for the girls that need attention. Somehow, they give us some importance, they satiate our thirst to help others, this basic need to be someone’s hero. Bulk girls, we can like them just for that, it is obvious that choosing between a depressive alcoholic who speaks of her father like if he was a dead rat and a healthy girl (who practices yoga and eats organic food, hahaha) and has 30 million friends including lesbians, we choose the second. But the first category all the same has this “SOS women in distress” side we like.
We like the Lancelot side, this little “je ne sais quoi” that makes us feel more useful than usual, this little thing that boosts our ego… That’s why personal development is such an important part of seduction: realizing our own value and developing it, it’s coming off the shitty values that we have received during our education, while keeping the important ones. An awesome guy will so logically never go into the category of poor girls, unless he has a void to fill.
In short: even if we want to be a hero because it’s “in”, because women are touching when they are afraid or when they cry, let’s keep in mind that we are a normal guy. If you want to be the man of every situation for her, while you do not know her that well, realize that you are doing an unhealthy blocking. If she wants you to take major decisions in her life for her, if she wants to get you in the diagram girl = victim / guy = protector, understand that she is a girl with problems.
Recognizing your own value and developing it by having a rich life and a vibrant social circle, is moving away from this kind of chicks. In addition, being the hero is no use: in the end, Leia ends with Han Solo, the jerk. Chuck with Blair and Elena fucks Damon.
Seek medical help, girls, seriously.