What is this fucking self-esteem we’re talking about all the time? What is it and on what does it feed?
For Reasoner W.-R: “Self-esteem is the consciousness of the personal value that can be recognized in different areas.”
In other words, is to appreciate your true value. And I stress the word TRUE. Not below as tend to do some of my readers. As to choose, perhaps a little bit superior to reality: it’s good for your mood.
Self-esteem mainly feeds on :
– Your material success (what you undertake)
– Your social success (recognition, feeling appreciated by others)
Obviously your level of self-confidence is related to your self-esteem. The above-mentioned elements reinforce the positive beliefs about yourself: they remind and reinforce it inside you.
All this makes sense … However, and this is a big however (like HOWEVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER) : It is dangerous make your stability depend on external elements.
“Our salvation and loss are in ourselves.” (Epictetus)
“Let’s seek our goods in ourselves, otherwise we will not find them.” (Epictetus)
It is therefore necessary to make a short introspective work to find your freedom and well-being. Try to understand how you operate, your qualities, flaws, strengths, weaknesses, identify your fears in order to overcome them, etc.
The goal is that your confidence will do no more coming-and-going between the moments when you fuck a girl and when a drunk bitch put a rake and makes fun of you.
This introspective work will allow you to be more authentic with yourself and with others, especially women. Basically, you will see more clearly in your life.
Recess strategies and comparisons with other guys will no longer be needed. Most of your limiting beliefs will disappear. You will feel better about yourself…
According to you, what is your real level? Surely higher than what you imagine right now: you can bang more beautiful women! You can make threesomes too! You will no longer need to want to prove anything to anyone. Your interactions become more genuine. And that shit-test “do you say that to all the girls? / does it usually work with the girls that? “will no longer be needed. Maybe it will even make you smile.
The phase of “comfort” in the Mystery Method is neither more nor less than a phase of authenticity. It is therefore essential to please and seduce. At least, if you want to establish real relationships with women, relationships that can lead to healthy and fulfilling relationships. Why not preferring honesty and exchange to small grooming games?
The purpose of embarking on this little work:
– Developing your confidence with a solid foundation, which will be key to your success with women and in other areas;
– Enjoying your success because you have won, I mean the real you, and do not depend on success to feel good.
Why not living better with yourself and with the women who are part of your life? Everyone will be better off. What so tragic have you to hide, really?
Examples:
Some struggle against anxiety to approach a woman. If they took a step back on it, they would realize how ridiculous it is. They would say “I’m going for it, I’m not a weak boy!”
Some have been abused by an ex who took them for idiots. They then multiply the fuck-friends because they do not want to give women the control again. They are obsessed by jealousy when they see frequently a woman too. These behaviors disappoint themselves. By identifying them, they will better master them.
Some lie to their partners by having multiple “serious” relationships simultaneously. They therefore also have a lack of conviction and do not assume what they really want. It might be time to take stock of their life, it must be stressful to lie to everyone like that with the fear of being uncloaked.
Some base their pseudo-confidence of the day in alcohol or in a coach but the next day they become introverted again. They ruin their liver… when others go down to the basement bar with a strange and penetrating modjo, dark and terribly sensual. A sexual aura around them accompanies them when they approach women. If they had a history of timid, it is now a distant memory.
To be continued…