Category: Psychology and communication

“I am like Saint Thomas, I believe what I see.”

Most people think that seeing is believing. But…  what if they were wrong ? What if in fact believing was seeing?

Maybe just thinking we’re good with women, or believing that the game works so is enough so that it works. And perhaps it is “enough” to do not believe so that it does not work.

Facebook is full of shitty quotes that are nonetheless true. Such as “they did not know it was impossible, so they made it.” I am not saying it is impossible to pick up hotties in night clubs, I’m just saying if you do not provoke your luck, it will probably not happen magically.

We all know someone who has succeeded with women without the game. As we all know someone who can eat like a horse without being fat. So what… ? If this is not your case, I do not see how it applies to you. Equality exists only in the Motto of the French Republic. In practice, we are not all equal in life. We all have a different genetic makeup, we must adapt. We all have strengths and weaknesses. But in general, with work, we can get ahead in all areas.

After the discovery of the seduction community, some alphas become fulfilled, others stagnate in their mediocre love life. Facing a problem, it is often what we decide to believe that determines the outcome. Since childhood, I have always wondered “how am I going to do that?” instead of “will I be able to do that?”

Thus, by not considering that I was not able to do something, I always looked for a way to do it. That helped a lot. Beliefs are the key to seduction and personal development in general. I’m not saying it is enough to believe that we are rich to see a million in our bank account (we do not do magic). I speak of a less superficial reality I speak of your inner strength. And in my humble opinion, this is much more important.

We all have built beliefs about everything. About us, about the others, about the game… Our beliefs influence how we see things : so they influence our mood and our internal chemistry.

“I decided to be happy because it is good for health.” Voltaire

Basically, beliefs are positive mechanisms that are useful to filter our perception. They are used to relieve us of the burden of reflection. However, if we let this weapon turn against us, it limits our results and can even destroy us.

We must understand that whatever our beliefs are, our unconscious works to prove it. If we believe that we are a shit, we will always find in our field of perception some things to support this theory. If we think we can pickup a hottie, you will see life more positively and become more attractive. We’ll be more likely to succeed than people who think that beautiful women are not made for guys like them.

This is also the interest of placebo medication for example: people believe that the treats works and sometimes they really heal without apparent reason.

Given this situation, my conclusion is this: the smartest thing to do is to create beliefs that help us. Because, whether true or false, they will influence our lives. They will become a habit of thought. So it is better if they are useful and beneficial.

Beliefs have a huge impact on our lives: they allow self-fulfilling prophecies. Positive or negative? It depends on us. But in any case, they influence our emotional state which itself is a major key to seduction.

Some PUAs are convinced that all the women want them. It’s not true, but this belief helps them because it gives them confidence. This high level of confidence allows them to have a naturally attractive behavior, which leads to actually charm women.

Their unconscious keeping only the information that goes in this direction, it gives them a reinforced good mood which makes them concretely more attractive. And when they are rejected, their unconscious quickly occults it. For them, the standard is a success. It is still a way of thinking much healthier and more positive than when success is considered an anomaly.

If an opener works once, then twice, you will tend to believe that it will always work. This is wrong, of course, but we will take confidence because we know that it has worked. So, when used, it will show more confidence. Thus, we communicate much more positive things that will make this opener work more than others. But its power is actually coming from the beliefs we have about him.

If, unfortunately, we start a night with rakes, we could have the conviction that it is a bad night and go home. Instead, if we had started with good interaction, we would have felt like with grown wings, which would have encouraged us to try more daring moves.

There is a luck factor in the game, certainly, but it is not because we ate only rakes during one evening that should prevent us from trying to kiss a nice model. The only thing that may negatively influence the interaction is the negative dynamics in which we are bogged down into. If we can break it and get back on a positive way, we will have as much chance with her as if we were not in a bad dynamic.

The first step to work on your beliefs is to recognize that you have some. If you are human, you might be the more open-minded in to world, you have some. Thus, in those thoughts that come to your mind, which generalizations are the most emotionally charged? By becoming conscious of them, you can begin to act on it.

Frankly, we don’t care if your beliefs are true or false, the important thing is that they allow you to be happy. So keep those that help you and change those that draw you down.

When we know that, unconsciously, believing allows an infinite number of things, we must understand that it is one of the most important aspects of your personal development. This is not to scare you, but it reminds me of the result of an experience I had read. I warn you, it’s scary! A group of people had been locked in a room (by Nazis, I think) and were led to believe that the temperature had dropped to something like -10°C while it was actually about +10°C . Well, some froze to death in a few minutes.

There are also stories of people, often mentally ill, who think they are someone else but effectively demonstrate knowledge and skills coming from nowhere. So we know a lot more things than we think we know. You must still be motivated to take action. It is clear that keeping a blog and a diary in which I tell you my adventures with the opposite sex pushed me to be better so I have something interesting (I hope) to tell.

The powers of the mind are far greater than what we think. For example, at age 17, while he was very ill, bedridden in his room, Milton Erickson heard a doctor telling his mother in the next room that he will be dead the next morning. Erickson asked his mother to move his bed so that he can see the sunset one last time before dying. He lived what he later called a self-hypnosis experience, during which he saw the sun, ignoring the tree and the barrier that blocked his view by the window. Besides, he did not die that night, and it was a good idea because he became one of the fathers of modern hypnosis… probably inspired by this experience.

But I do not ask you to perform miracles. Just decide to change your reality when it does not suit you. Beliefs depend mainly on your inner dialogue, the way you speak and formulations that you use when you speak. So you need to act on it to improve your state of mind! Go slowly. Use a positive turn in dialogue with yourself, facing on a desired result and not on what you want to avoid.

Instead of saying “I am nowhere with women,” you say “so far I have not had a lot of results but now I decided to change that.” In this logic, “I’m afraid to take a rake” becomes “I want this to work.” Finally, “I do not approach because it never works” becomes “I approach because this practice will allow me to succeed.” Do you get the idea?

Then repeat to internalize. Repeat your new formulations of your beliefs. Coue method, despite what most people say, works. This is not ONLY intellectual masturbation, all this shit! It can actually help you if you decide to believe and practice.

Drive your state! I did at first. I had a list of positive affirmations displayed in my room, so I impregnate myself every time I passed ahead. If you want to read them, they are still available for free here.

Correct your dialogue when you catch yourself thinking negatively. Finally, visualize like if your beliefs were real tomorrow. Imagine kissing pretty girls, imagine that you open your door to a beautiful chick you would have seduced on the Internet and who would come directly to fuck you. Your old beliefs will actually be replaced with new if you can join the most powerful emotions. And visualization is a good way to do this before it happens for real.

In all my ebooks, I communicate my state of mind of womanizer and my vision of things. Thus, by reading me, your reality is deforming to become a little closer to a reality in which you can fuck a lot. Do not hesitate to read if you are a little lost in the mass of information in the community, but determined to succeed. You will see your glass prison melting slowly: you will still have to give the final push to fully destroy it.

In short, it’s up to you to see how much you want to invest in your success with the opposite sex. Of course, the more you work, the better (if it’s not to stir the air – some people do it to salve their conscience).

Believe in yourself and decide to make yourself right! It’s an order ! Courage!

The concept of value is one of the most important for success in seduction. Even if you did not know this concept, you surely were using it without even noticing it.

 

1 – The value in the seduction community

In seduction, we tend to see value as something that can create attraction. Where from the idea to practice DHV – demonstration of high(er) value.

We will speak of the “perceived” value because when doing a cold approach it’s the only one a girl can see. Thus, it may be wise to always behave as if we had a great value. It is not dishonest, it’s just a way to be in a better light. It will always be better than the assholes who often are successful because they have assholes behavior but that can be perceived as “high value” behavior.

So far we were talking about “alpha behavior” on this blog, but today we’ll try to see it in another light. It goes without saying that, basically, we say the same thing as usual. This is just another way of seeing things, other words put on the same concepts.

So, giving the image of a guy who has value helps having good results quickly. Mystery used the peacoking for it. The negs also. Personally, I prefer to have really got a great mental strength and now I know what I am worth. Replicas and other behavior showing that I am a “high value” guy come naturally to me… I confess, however, that at first I forced a little the thing, taking models as an example (PUA, movie characters, etc. ). I practiced “fake it until to you make it.”

Often in my field reports, I said that I sat next to the girl and she came over to kiss me. I justified it by “she cracked because of the sexual tension.” This is a way of seeing things. But one could also say that she found me alpha and was so excited that she jumped on me. Finally, we could say that I informed him that I had so a high value for her at that moment so she threw herself on me to be sure I will fuck her.

Little riddle, who has the highest value?
– The one that approaches or the one who is approached?
– The one that numclose or the one who is numclosed?
– The one that offers an appointment or the one who is offered?
– The one that kiss or the one who lets himself be kissed?
– The one who accepts fucking a girl or the one who pushes hard to fuck?

In general, it is always the one who is sought who has the most value. However, the inner game can allow us to see things differently: I’m a guy who dares approach so I have a high value. I’m a guy who dares to warm her to make her want to fuck so I have a great value.

To finish this part, I would say that I hate guys who are pressuring a girl to have sex by treating her like a princess. And that, once they have fucked her, think they have immediately taken a lot of value and therefore treat her like shit. To me, your value should not depend on the validation of a particular girl, but should come from your mind. From your way of thinking. Finally, do not treat girls badly especially if they did not deserved it.

 

 

2 – The different types of value

Now we will talk about fixe different types of value… but when it comes to the value in general it’s a little the five at a time. If we were into micromanaging, we could say that we have a specific value for each target and that it is up to us to make her see what she can expect to gain by being with us. But there are more general values, who give us less headaches (I prefer that), you will see that.

A – The emotional value

The idea, when it comes, is to communicate that we represent an added value, not that we will be an anvil.

The first question to ask yourself to see if you can have any value in the eyes of someone is: what can you bring to this person? What added value do you have for her?

For example, you work in a trendy club and can therefore make people come in and offer free drinks. Hence the appeal of the Party Girls for servers. Or you are rich and so a girl who would enter your life might enjoy a bit of your lifestyle.

Most of my readers are like me I think normal people at this level. So we mostly represent added value if we can create emotions (mostly positive). Or if we can offer benefits like super good orgasms. Thus, an added value can be intellectual, monetary, benefits of all types, services, emotions…

In the community, we prefer the emotional value because women love it and that is cheap. Many suckers think their only value in the eyes of a woman is to pay her glasses. How sad… Instead, make her live emotions like intrigue, excitement, etc.

B – Social Value

It is the one that people give you. This is what is sometimes called social proof.

It is often said that seeking to break the rapport is a good idea because it shows that we have a value greater than the other person. And looking for the rapport shows that we have a low social value. I do not agree. I think that establishing good communication is more important than trying to show at all costs that we have a high value. Also, if we show a too high value and in addition we do not create rapport, we risk alienating people. Because we intimidate them or because they really believe they are a shit in our eyes.

The important thing is still to do not seek for approval. Do not be needy. But negs and everything, it’s really to be used with caution (for example if there’s a bitch shield).

C – The survival and replication value

It is the most developed value sub-concept in the community because most related to the attraction and the most generic.

This is just what evopsy explains: we all look for partners who can bring us resources for us and our offspring.

Are attractive in terms of values:
– Survival (strength, power, intelligence …)
– Replication (health, beauty, fertility, etc.)

As you probably already know, the weight of these features in the attraction is reversed in men and in women. The potential of attraction of a woman is based 80% on her replication value while in a man it’s 80% of his survival value. Do not they say that both sexes are complementary?

D – The specific values

The specific value is the subjective value that is for a person based on her own characteristics or the circumstances. Most people have, consciously or not, one or more personal criteria.

A rich daddy’s girl will not give the same value to the professional situation of a guy than a girl who is not rich. A girl is looking the image of her father in his lovers, which is different for each (if they do not have the same father). A PUA who has the choice will be more demanding regarding his girlfriends than a virgin who is desperate to ejaculate one day.

Sometimes one has a value simply because he is there. Some girls do not filter on natural biological unconscious criteria but on orders of psychological criteria (their neurosis) or other more conscious stuff. Some do not seek an alpha male but a beta male so he serves her as a princess, others are just looking for a guy who has a car, or a fuck without complications or any guy who can lift her spirit her with his cock because she just has been dumped with humiliation.

That’s why some suckers sometimes get hot babes (good for them). That’s why sometimes we fuck even if we do not practice DHV. It finally explains why we can not have 100% success.

Many chicks like tall men. But some are afraid or are complexed. They therefore prefer shorter guys. For some, a guy who drives a Porsch is a gambler who surely makes up for his small cock, for others it is particularly attractive.

Eh yes ! Thus, there are vulgar girls who fancy on riffraff who are in a tracksuit all day, with a hood and who spit on the floor. But hey, they are often the same picture than them, so I am not interested.

In my high school, a guy looked like Harry Potter (uglier) and some chicks liked him just for that reason. This is what can be called a marginal value because he is far from being a sex symbol, Harry Potter. If you like him, take the example of Austin Power : if a girl liked the character in the movie she can be attracted by a guy looking like him.

If the guy looked like Ian Somerhalder, the fact of licking him would not be a marginal behavior, because most chicks find him very beautiful. In this case, a guy who would even a little bit look like him would gain in value by ricochet effect of the fantasy value of Ian.

There are chicks who like submitted guys. Suckers. To dominate them widely and everything. This is a relatively rare behavior, but for them being a loser gives value. I advise you of course to do not adopt this behavior, precisely because it is rare and mostly because you must respect yourself in life.

E – The hidden values

Sometimes our value lies in what the other feels when they are with us : serenity, security, freedom, fun, appreciation, etc.

If a girl says she loves the tall and muscular men, it’s probably because she feels safe with them. Men who are not tall and muscular will therefore have an interest in making her feel safe by using communication. This is not the dishonest manipulation if they are able to guarantee her safety for real : if not why not just changing the target?

Identifying the things that are important for a girl helps to DHV specifically on this criterion (calibration/adaptation). What is potentially more powerful than a general DHV. In addition, it can help to create the rapport with the conversation that will flow from it.

So you can dig to find her hidden values ​​or simply deduct it from what she says. Otherwise than that, to match her specific values, one can only rely on luck!

 

3 – The utility of value and how to recognize value

Any value is relative, ours (depending on whose eyes) like the value of our target (it depends on who games her). You must understand that a person has not got the same value for everybody.

We do not game someone with a high value like someone with a low value. We do not really play the same way with a 20 year old student shy than facing a thirty blossomed in her life.

What is the value of a girl for you? And what is your value from her point of view?

Basically, what is the value?
– Physics rating, replication value (traditionally between 1 and 10 in the community – 5 being a girl with whom the average guy would have sex – 6 being my minimum to undress). Of course this replication note is adapted taking into account the values ​​related to survival (intelligence, social status, money, etc.)
– Her self-esteem, her confidence, level of welfare
– Her way of behaving with others, her beliefs, her mood of the moment
– Her social value (anonymous or actress, girl in a group or alone at the bar, the clothes she wears, etc.) The prestige of banging a celebrity, or a model who poses in magazines, or the hottie college, doesn’t it make you hard ?
– The relative value, depending on the environment, circumstances, etc. A bartender is overpriced in her club, outside, she is probably nobody. A model in a normal club or at a beauty queen election it’s not the same level or arrogance.
– An attractive girl with humor, conversation is more likely to have fun with me.
– Our identity and specific values: I like classy girls, elegant, open-minded…

Some think that if a girl has a “high value” she must be negged directly. No ! Think about it: you may very well find value in a super friendly and open girl. No need to be aggressive from the start! In addition, she is maybe not aware of her value in your eyes. Understand that your reality is not everybody’s reality.

Depending on your current form, or your status in such a place, it is sometimes better to practice very direct game than taking gloves! According to the competition there is in the place where you are, your value can also increase or decrease.

We are attracted by what is more valuable than us. But beyond a certain big difference, ego protects itself. That’s why some unfuckable chicks and too full of ego allow themselves to talk to us badly while we were just being nice. This difference of value explains why sometimes chicks that are not worth a 4/10 will violently reject us as we just talking for socializing (we were not even flirting).

We tend to say that 2 points (/10) of difference between two people, it is still possible if the person in front is confident. With 4 points of difference, it is a miracle.

The value of a man resides essentially in his inner game. So if you are convinced of being a 8, you can bang 10 if you are confident. In addition, women are much more sensitive to the mental strength of a man than we are. Or other solution : totally kill your ego.

According to this principle of value, chicks who are chasing send Indicator Of Interest and other Approach Invitation to the alpha male with the highest value perceptible to them.

Sometimes we don’t care about the value of a girl but it is society that puts on us a pressuring judgment. For example: a lot of guys would be ready to fuck a 5 on the condition that no one ever knows. But if the whole office could be aware, then there, they would not. Without perceptible value, sexual tension needs discretion. According to this logic, the more your value you show, the more a woman will allow herself to be excited in your presence.

The sexual tension, you know it, varies over time and according to your actions. But sometimes a value is enough to create sexual tension. If you offer a night with Ian Somerhalder, many women may get wet just thinking about it. So you have to play with the attraction, the value and the sexual tension.

The value of a person also depends on the quality of interactions that we can have with. So in case of bad vibe, you will have a low value in the eyes of the girl, even if you have a great value. But often, she will make efforts to feed the conversation if she is interested (unless you make her feel too shy).

I suggest you to investigate yourself, identify your own criteria, in order to do not miss the women who could make you really happy. Especially the one that could give you what your biology and your values ​​are looking for…

 

4 – How to demonstrate value

The principle of “Fake it up to you make it” is to behave as if we had a value until we really get it. Demonstrating more value will logically increase your success rate.

Assuming at the outer game and inner game level (by pretending this is a part of you it will become more real), you will create in other people the impression that you have this value (which is just a perceived value but can become real).

But in addition, you will receive in return verbal and non-verbal responses to this characteristic that will change little by little your own beliefs about yourself. Which will really help you to really get it.

Therefore, behave like a womanizer (or just like an alpha male for those who are soft) !!!

All our actions communicate characteristics and therefore value. Try to communicate DHV and avoid DLV – demonstration of low(er) value – to an audience you want to seduce. For example, in seduction, being too nice especially if the girl is abhorrent, it is a DLV. It says about you that you are a weak…

Thus, to communicate that you are a seducer, you will not tell it. You will make this clear by suggesting through what you say or do. You can tell, without bragging, stories that have happened to you. Or if pretty girls come and say hello, you can suggest that you have fucked them all. Or if you receive a naughty text, pretend to be discreet when in fact you make sure that other people see it. So you will subcommunicate what? That you bang a hottie, that she is so turned on by you that she sends naughty messages, that you have a beautiful phone so that you are rich, etc.

These are not things I usually do, because I prefer the more natural things, but these techniques can work. Personally, I behave like an alpha, and I let people wonder “but what is this secret that gives him such a confidence?”

Here’s how to easily communicate value:
– Be confident and ambitious, you will succeed;
– The social proof (ie with good wingmen and wingwomen (preselection) or practice butterfly on groups so you look like someone knowing a lot of different people);
– Don’t look bored, have composure;
– Stay alpha even in front of tests (targets, cockblocks, amogs);
– Do not drool when you see a beautiful girl, if you communicate it is normal for you, you will look like a guy who has great value because used to fuck hotties ;
– Show that you have the choice, you are demanding;
– Show that you have a higher value than the average guy, and a strength of character, you are a prize ;
– Show that you’re not a lambda sucker, you know women;
– Convince yourself that you have a high value, especially as regards survival and replication.

 

I hope you enjoyed this article.

There is a negative attitude I have often seen in people who begin in the game (and with myself when I started). This is the attitude of imagining connections between things that are not connected (often to be reassured).

Concretely, what does that mean?

Imagine a guy was trying to pick up girls in the street but he got nothing for months. Then one day, he had the brilliant idea to go on the field by wearing a hat. And that day, miracle: he took the number of a girl! His conclusion will probably be : “oh fuck, as soon as I wear a hat, it works.”

Wearing a hat would be THE ultimate seduction technique?

The problem is that next time on the field, this guy could become superstitious, and force himself to wear a hat to pick up chicks. But the truth is that he would surely have taken the same number even if he had nothing on the head (this was statistically THE hottie who wants to fuck you for the fun without complicating everything). And therefore, objectively he will have the same results with or without hat in the future.

The excesses of this thinking are twofold:
– There is a false belief : we need a hat to seduce;
– It can be believed so much that this ridiculous belief could be transmitted to young Padawans who come for advice.

It gives sad but easily observable results on seduction forums: a lot of nonsense and intellectual masturbation ! No, we must learn to separate out the essential things from the rest…

I took the example of the hat because it was easily understandable but it’s not where I was going. And the fact is that, in practice, the hat is fine for some people. Moreover, to open sets at night, it can be cool and efficient! The perfect example would be: a guy wears a hat one day and finds €20 on the ground and it has rarely happened to him before. So he thinks he can find money on the ground that he is wearing a hat and therefore starts wearing it every day. If, he finds some money on the ground in the future, it will strengthen his belief (even if it is still less than before).

But it is when applied to seduction schools that my reasoning makes sense. You will better understand with a story!

I have a friend who has practiced Street Pick-Up (SPU) for several months before fucking his first girl met in the street. When I went on the field with him, he yelled “no, you’re too direct! This is not how to do: me, the only one I have picked up, I talked to her for almost an hour before asking for her number. “

Result: he loses even today hours talking with chicks to finally be told “oh no sorry I would have liked but I have a boyfriend” (or any other variant). And except that day, that was maybe blessed, he is always coming back empty-handed.

He is still convinced that this is how he will have the best results. Period. He is blinded by the fact that the only time he fuckclosed thanks to a number taken in the street, it was by doing it that very indirect way. Suddenly, he no longer sees the downside of his processes (huge loss of time).

At that same session I did with him, I was very direct. I have not taken a lot of numbers, that’s true. But I fucked one of the chicks I had numclosed… and yes, she was hot! Isn’t it stupid to talk about everything and nothing with a girl not interested when, thanks to the numbers, we could talk about sex with an interested girl.

Instead of understanding me and to question his ways, he criticized me and told me that I JUST had a fluke. Well, sure, luck played… but still! Him, it was for more than six months he was hitting the streets… and he got one street-FC in Lyon. Me, I did a session and I got one street-FC too. I do not say it enough: be pragmatic and make your time profitable. I had the chance to exchange on the subject with people who are knowledgeable in SPU (Snipe for example) and I KNOW it is by being direct that we maximize our results.

Seeing links where there is no link can therefore turn you, like my friend, to methods that do not bear so much fruits and block you into dead ends for years (principle of consistency). So beware: put things in perspective before jumping to conclusions!

Another thing: sometimes, guys do not think for themselves and take for granted things that a person they consider objective and good said. For example, a woman (usually their mother, sister or an ugly friend) told them with a peremptory tone that they must behave in such a way to have success (eg “be patient and pay for everything”). Since that day, they reject any advice from “competent” people (by that I mean people having concrete results and knowing how to transmit their knowledge) even if they their efforts did not pay so far. It’s stupid, not wanting to be “alpha”!

My opinion about seduction tips from women: “If you do not fuck her, do not listen to her.”

First, because maybe the girl who gives you her opinion is sincere but does not match the type of girls you would like to fuck. So, since there is nothing absolute in seduction, it directs you in the wrong direction: how to seduce the women that you do not want.

Furthermore, because the social pressure must be taken into account and that women who have not slept with you have often more difficulties to talk frankly about these things. They are more interested in maintaining their image of “purity.” It will be harder for them to do so if you just banged them in doggy style with some little spanking !!! The ice will also be broken: they will less feel shy.

On the contrary, some say that all the girls are sexually hardcore and everything. But as you do not see it in the life of every day, you will be in misunderstanding and think you’re ugly. But no, it’s only because they describe their reality when they say that … because with their girl-friends they talk a lot about sex (like us). Some will even exaggerate about their sex life to look smarted : but if you talk about the fact that it can become real with you, they may get cold feet because they do not often assume the fact of having oversold themselves. How to cope with all this shit? Make your own opinion and talk about gender relations with your conquests on the pillow! You will discover the reality for yourself and it will be even better (if you want you can read my ebook to take a shortcut).

I do not even talk about those who do not even know what turn them on nor about those that teach you how to be a good but submitted HUSBAND (not a good lover nor a good one-night) to better manipulate you.

In short, you can not imagine with the human: read the advice of competent people, experience to make your own opinion and draw YOUR OWN measured and thoughtful conclusions from repeated empirical facts. And finally, we do not forget that hazard controls our lives a little bit.

Today, I decided to take stock of what is unacceptable in a girl. I wish to speak of these little character traits and physical details that are eliminatory for me and for most members of the male sex I interviewed. I asked only players confirmed … not sex-starved who, anyway, would start in a relationship with anyone delivered with a vagina.

 

1 / An interested girl

I’m talking about a girl interested in our money. Who would make us pay for everything and everything. Who would play the princesses we must support … But, if she is just interested in our cock, it’s all right.

 

2 / A girl too possessive

I have known one like that: she was all the time close to me, sit on me while I had not even finished eating, she wanted to see me all the time, etc. Leave us a little air!!! If in addition she plays on emotional blackmail or ultimatum, next!

 

3 / A disturbing detail on her face

This is personnal : some people it will be a big nose, others it will be a leek on the face, me … it is the hair that grows on the cheeks which cut me envy. Unfortunately, the girl help much with those thing, but she can compensate or find other guys it will not block.

 

4 / A green plant

This is a girl who does not speak, do not move, in short that blends into the background like an ornament… A not curious girl, who is interested in nothing in particular, who does not know where she is going in life. It does not interest us, these relationships that enrich only one of the two protagonists.

 

5 / An immature girl

This kind of idiot who act like teenagers while she is 25 years old, who watches seriously crappy emissions, who idolizes guys whose image is retouched by Photoshop but who did not understand that. I also fall into this category the girls who play it fashion to disguise the fact they are a stupidity abyss: they try to impose their frame “I am a star” but only fools accept. We laugh in their faces!

 

6 / A girl with a difficult character

The kind that makes whims all the time, it sucks. The nervous that yell, the hysterical, the unstable in all kinds, TOO. A girl without tact that takes pleasure in belittling me or telling people intimate stuff that might make me uncomfortable, it would be next ! Same thing if she is full of hate.

 

7 / A girl with an addictive behavior

For example smokers with black teeth, those who are drunk every weekends, those who use drugs, those who have too much tattoos and piercings, who changes her hair coloc every month (blue, green, red) etc. Damn, we did work on ourselves to improve, it is not to end up with this kind of girls! We are not desperate !!! There are people who love smoking because “it is sociable girls” … but that’s just an excuse, in fact, they just like to smoke with them and their personal development process stops when it would be necessary to  make a effort to stop smoking. Sorry if I offended sensitive souls, but it was to make them think.

 

8 / A not feminine girl

Sorry but we like girls who take care of themselves. Who perfume, smell good and everything. Who choose their outfit carefully. In short, we want to be proud to have them in our arms.

 

9 / A girl who speaks badly

I hate vulgarity. A girl who speaks in “riffraff” mode, I find it anti-sexy. Especially if she is aggressive and wants to play the man … I like girls who talk properly and, for that matter, who write correctly too. If they read in addition, are cultivated, and understand second degree humour : it is perfect!

 

10 / A girl who has bad eating habits

You already know it but many of us do not love the soft girls that make no effort (no sport) and in addition who make us eat shit that gives stomach ache when we visit them. If they don’t understand we don’t like bad food, because they find McDo very cool, we disappear !

 

11 / A dirty girl

If she lives alone but has 3 cats and 2 dogs, that her apartment is messy, dirty and smells like piss: we flee! We also run away if she feels perspiration but she is not coming back from sport, she stinks from the mouth, or her pussy smells like sanitary sewers just when we have just approached or her pubis is archi-hairy and she refuses to remedy.

 

12 / A close-minded girl

The kind of girl who refuses to think for herself (full of preconceived ideas), to question, to make efforts to get out of her comfort zone and to experiment things that are out of the ordinary: this kind of girl will probably not go very far in life so we do not want her on our side. We want women that pull us up!

 

13 / An unconscious girl

We flee if she is not aware of the risks of STDs and wants to fuck without a condom while she does not know us (one flees perhaps after fucked her), if she has already aborted while she is just 18 (one flees perhaps after fucked her), if she sucks with teeth, etc.

 

14 / A girl who has a weird social circle

If she has more guys than girls friends, let’s beware. If she does not like any of our relatives or if her friends are social cases, all shelter!

 

15 / If she misbehaves in public

If she burps in front of people, farts or if she is simply rude to servers: ouch.

 

16 / A girl who talks too much

The kind who talks too much but that has nothing to say, who cannot stand the silence then fills with crap music if necessary, or wants us to talk about shit making us uncomfortable : it pisses us off. We are not passing an interview and we have not to prove that we are “normal”.

 

17 / A girl who talks all the time of her ex

Or who compares us to other guys for free, is a pain in the ass. Especially if she brags or something like that.

 

18 / A girl who doesn’t know how to kiss nor fuck

Some girls, when they kiss, they put us very uncomfortable by blowing into our mouths. When they suck us, we feel nothing. And when we have sex with, we wonder if they are sleeping. Frankly, it does not really want.

 

19 / A girl who gives us a headache with her shitty principles

If the girl quickly gives us a headache with her fucking stupid principles, or her strict rules of life, or anything else that pisses us off, run away !!! There are people who assume being pains in the ass, that test us to see if they can go too far, etc. That kind of girl can go doing in with other guys!

 

20 / A girl who, one year ago, had a dick and no tits…

And without laughing, those who are operate, implants and everything from head to foot, or has a disproportionate body. Even worse if she is proud of her huuuuuuuuuuuuge breasts and exhibits them to rhyme.

 

Did I forget something ? And you, what is blocking you in a girl? Feel free to leave a comment.

 

PS = I’m not talking for a one night stand but for something more serious…

The concept of frame (frame), what is it?

Let’s start with a simple definition: the frame can be defined as the set of mental conditions that give direction to everything that happens in an interaction.

The frame is, literally, the general framework of interaction: this is the reality as it is apprehended by the communicators involved.

It is a concept of communication in the wide sense, not just something to pick up chicks.

 

Derived notions : reframe and outframe

The trick is to reinterpret the meaning of what the other says to turn it to our advantage. “I will not sleep with you tonight (do not want to look like an easy girl)
– Are you afraid to reach a too powerful orgasm ?”

The principle of outframing is to change the course of the discussion by taking height. “You’re a stranger, we are not going to sleep together so fast
– Really ? Isn’t it exactly very exciting to have sex with a stranger? ”

 

The purpose of placing a good frame in the interaction

The frame will cause thoughts that will cause a result. In fact, the power of the frame comes from the creation of new thoughts, new ways of seeing things, which produces a result.

I prefer communicating that “having sex is normal and natural” rather than “only the big whores fuck on the first ate.” In my reality, the woman wins as much or more than me when she sleeps with me… so she must deserve sex as much as me. This frame is strong, and it prevents me from being a patsy. But I cannot say it point blank to a woman, it would not be credible, although it is reality. MY reality.

The goal of this method is to train yourself to see things as it suits you without becoming blind and to share your world with the girl you like.

 

X, Y and Z

It is possible to redefine the action, behavior or thing (X); to redefine the meaning of the action (Y) or to redefine the subtle implication (Z). In fact, we have the choice to either keep X and change Y or to keep Y and then change X or to keep the chick-test intact but to change the Z (the more often in a humorous way).

The redefinition 1 make her notice that if I wanted to do X with the meaning she assumes  my action (my X) would have been rather like this (reframe). “If I wanted to pick you up, you’d already know it, I would rather kiss you.” Kissclose.

The redefinition 2 is to informally recognize our action (X) but we redefine the meaning of it (the Y). “Yes I have approached you, but that’s not why it’s beforehand won for you. ”

The redefinition 2 is to question what she has just concluded (Z) : make it look ridicule or turn it toyour advantage. “Because I paid you a drink to kiss you, you think I’m a patsy? I I did because you deserve it with your good conversation. ”

 

Concrete examples

We can :
– Discredit what she said by claiming that she does not even believe herself what she says (for example by making them aware that they like you) ;
– Affirm the girl uses a shit-test only because she has a naughty intention in her mind (it is playful and allows to reverse the situation);
– Ask if she tests you because she likes you and hopes to sleep with you if you are not a patsy (curveball). ;
– Just ignore when she says things that are not going in the right direction (but careful with that one you should not imagine things anyway … just ignore her fucking headaches and internal dilemmas).

One can also try to impose some form of framework in the interaction to influence or at least to make things easier. “Will you come to my place tomorrow or on Friday night?” Will be more successful than“do you want to meet again one day? “

But hey, that’s pure and simple communication. Almost marketing. Work out your split, your puns and your innuendos! 😉

 

Imposing a frame

The frame can be verbal or non-verbal, real or just perceived. In this sense, everyone can impose a frame. For example, a girl who says she only wants a serious relationship: you can now invite her to reconsider things. Btw, if you read my blog, you know all the arguments in favor of “carpe diem“.

 

Confrontation of two frames

Where things get complicated is when women will try to impose their frames to see if they can get all of you (basically I don’t want them to eat your arm when you give them your hand).

If, for example, you approach a girl in a bar and she tells you after five minutes “Are you flirting with me? You pay me a drink? “Here she involves things that lead to the conclusion that she is the price in the interaction.

In a case like this where you lose control of the interaction, a reframing or outframing seem necessary. For example, “You’d love that I try to seduce you, right?
– Yes
– So why do you need me to buy you a drink? ” or “no
– Then why have you still your face so close to mine? (No need to attack her immediately, saying that she is a venal girl it depends on her answer but that risks to block her.) ”

Once upon a time, a girl approached me to ask me a cigarette. I said, “you took me for a âtsy or something? Find yourself a cigarette and come back picking me up without excuse if you want it. “She came back and I picked her up. This is the strongest frame that theoretically leads to the result. It is more difficult when there’s two stubborn persons. You have to be a little bit more flexible in this case!

Having a strong frame, is precisely defining yourself, knowing what you want and what you do not want. Normally, our frames naturally merge with your own identity because they logically come from it when you are in tune with yourself. If you’re not naturally capable to enough affirm yourself, fake it until it becomes natural.

 

Warnings

The problem of too strong reframing is that you would start a conflict, and it could block her. We must deal with you sympathy capital too.

The problem is that it can sometimes upset the chicks to be reframed. Or it could make sound the “alert inconsistency” in their minds if they are very conditionned. In the first case, be understanding if you’ve really been too aggressive with your words. In the second case, there’s not much to do…

Personally, I prefer to jump in it quickly to see if my frame is accepted by the chick. If it is not, I try to convince her. Otherwise, bye bye!

That said, in a closed circle like in high school, in a promo, or in a sports club, I think it is better to more take your time, to be more “civilized” and more subtle.

But against in NPU, SPU or online with unknown, no more excuses for not jumping into the crowd (it’s a metaphor) !!! And interactions should not last 1000 years or you risk the Friendzone the weariness and oblivion.

 

Conclusion

This argument shows us once again that communication is at the heart of seduction (and of many other areas). My advice: read books to better communicate and it will tremendously help you in life!

I’m writing today to explain why people are wrong when they hate PUAs (they do not even know exactly what they are talking about) and I will dismantle a lot of misconceptions about the PUAs at the end of my text .

A/ Ten more than rare qualities that have PUAs

Fasten your seat belts !

 

1/ We are men who “have balls”

The balls to go on the field and confront our fears instead of stupidly staying quietly suffering the fate that others have planned for us. We have ambition and are showing fighting spirit, we come out of the mold. That’s what pisses of a lot of men !!! Most guys are in denial, because it prevents them from making efforts and moving their ass, etc. In short, they are sheep. Some are afraid of wolves, me it’s clearly the herd that scares me sometimes … I just have to watch TV to observe this phenomenon.

 

2/ We are men with values

PUAs are probably not better nor worse than other people, basically. But we follow a code of honor. And we respect women: we are more feminist than average because we accept their right to sex. We are more respectful than the average because we also do not insult nor anything in the street. Finally, a woman who has fun is not for us “a slut”.

There is also a certain solidarity within the PUA community. For example, right now, one of my Padawans is in my apartment when I spend the weekend with my parents. Indeed, he suddenly found up on the street and he had no other solution. We are in a spirit of cooperation, sharing, not only of our knowledge. Solidarity is lost… the real, I mean, not that is only is not based on words.

 

3/ We are sincerely interested in understanding people

Frankly, since I was in college, I would like to understand women. But at first, I did it the wrong way : I asked directly to my girl-friends (with whom I did not sleep) what they liked or not and why. And none really knew me how to explain. Then they were banging guys very, very far from what they described.

I have started to take off when I discovered the seduction community. And those guys who exchange on the subject do love women … they do it FOR them but also FOR women.

We read a lot, we want to become cultivated, and we are forced to take an interest in human psychology in general to progress and understand social dynamics. So we look at humanity in general, not just women, even if they are the starting point of a long road that we will travel…

When I arrived in Lyon, 9 months ago I did not know anyone but I ha ve immediately been welcomed into a LAIR and made a lot of friends there and I also met a lot of girls thanks to pickup. That makes us sociable guys !!!

 

4/ We are men with culture

We read a lot. On many different topics. We try to understand how these things work, to think for ourselves and we agree to questioning. This demonstrates a certain form of intelligence. All people have are not capable of questioning themselves, far from it!

We make a lot of personal development and we improve in many areas indirectly because seduction is a multi-disciplinary. We finally becomes more philosophical in everyday life and perform better in all areas of life (eg we communicate better at work so we get better works).

5/ We are more open-minded than average

Inevitably, cultivating, it opens the mind. But for this you have to be curious and agree to try things. There is therefore a somewhat adventurous spirit, explorer behind the PUAs (we don’t want to die stupid, we want to know what is behind the glass wall)… Those who have not it and refuse to develop it will usually not go very far in the community.

It offers an alternative vision of reality, basically, we are creative. We don’t foolishly swallow the unique thought of the speech without filtering it to see when we are taken for idiots.

6/ We are more positive than many other

By facing our fear and dismantling our limiting beliefs, we actually are face to face with ourselves. So we learn to know ourselves. The game is a way to accept ourselves.

Because we confront the looks of others, mostly women, but also criticism in general, we become stronger, we assume more. And, unlike most people, we will not impose on them the burden of our own insecurities. We are thus less boring: there is less frustration than average into us and therefore we are more positive. Although the future that emerges is not necessarily beautiful, we know that how to to appreciate the small pleasure of life and we do not deny it! Carpe Diem !

 

7/ It inspires young people with a future

I have readers who have written to me to tell me they had taken off thanks to my blog. And it has not only allowed them to pick up chicks, it has especially given them the desire to take charge of their entire lives.

There are a lot of cute and smart guys who just don’t know how to approach, should we let them suffer ? We make them and the women they meet happy, this way.

 

8/ We are more honest than the average

We are more in contact with our instincts, our deepest nature, we don’t take headaches with stupid social conventions, which allows us to be more forthright.

We are not the type who turns a thousand years around the bush, to confuse the girl or what: we reveal our intentions quickly. Who cares, we can afford it, because we act in a way that gives us the choice. And therefore we cause our luck.

After that, it is of course possible that honesty and all that bothers most people who prefer ambient hypocrisy. But I think as Kurt Kobain that “It is better to be hated for what you are, than loved for what you are not.”

 

9/ We empathize

We listen and try to understand the others. This is the basis of the game. There’s no manipulation nor anything like that in what we do, contrary to received ideas.

On the contrary, when you have been very humiliated (by chicks in this case because they are often not kind to us), it normally makes you more humble, more human. Finally, in any case, it was my case. I was able to overcome a lot of my neuroses and all that shit through the game, so I have never wanted to make people suffer with this new power I acquired, I rather seek to do good around me.

Empathy and experience we acquire, are particularly apparent in the fact of not being selfish in bed. Basically, the PUA is a good leg. It’s maybe what pisses off the other guys, who instead of working on themselves prefer criticize us on Saturday night on the forums.

 

10/ We affirm more than others

Many people tend to live through another (eg the beloved) or through others (the look and the judgment of others) while it’s very important to know how to think about yourself sometimes, by yourself. To do things for yourself, for your personal enrichment. This is what we do, while remaining modest, because we understood that there is no need to be a God to sleep with a lot of girls.

It pisses a lot of people off because, contrary to popular belief, we do not need to have a big bank account nor to pay bottles to fuck chicks. But thinking otherwise arranges the guys to justify that they are zero “I have no money I can’t do anything” and also arranges venal chicks (not all thankfully but a lot among small brains).

The game is one of the form of personal development the least costly and the most effective out there. It has certainly helped avoiding a lot of suicides. Not like the politically correct psychologists that pump the money of their patients awaiting a miracle cure… and lecturing them when they start picking up in the street (it’s out of social conventions). “This is manipulation” or “you’re a shit to seduce just be natural.” Their agreed and false speech, coming from professionals, shows how society is ignorant and obscurantist. In addition, we may think that they are not happy something can motivate alsmot for free while they cost €50 per hour for doing nothing. OK, the pickup can create some neuroses (the guys who know everything by heart and who love quibbling) but eventually we overcome our obstacles and heals more neuroses than we created.

When I read some self-called “seduction coaches’ claiming that the PUAs do not exist (to justify their incompetence), I want to throw myself naked from the fourth floor, shouting obscenities. And if everyone stopped a bit to shoot the others in the legs in this little world, wouldn’t it be cool? Of course the PUA, it exists … we are not E.T.

The game it’s 80% of inner game, skills of communication and tsome nerve.

 

 B/ Dismantling of misconceptions about the PUAs

We would be men who give advice to allow our peers to sleep with any woman. But damn, I’ve said it 1000 times, there’s no magic formula : only multiple approaches and personal development.

In our advice, the woman’s consent would never the issue center. It’s really absurd to say this: we personally improves to please more women in order that they are of course willing. A PUA is not a rapist…

The pickup, it is not natural. Oh and the society in which we live, it is natural? You have to adapt, that’s all. With the game, one learns to get closer to his instincts while remaining civilized. Like Snipe wrote : a good player never thinks about the technique when he approaches a girl. He doesn’t say to hilself “I use this technique to achieve such a result.” The good player, the one who masters his art forgets the art, and he becomes what is called in the PUA jargon … a Natural.”

Basically, we appropriate concepts, that’s all. Then, they are part of us, eventually. Finally, we become ourselves, but the real “ourselves”, not the one who is stifled by social pressure and all that crap.

A Natural alpha is a guy who has success with the girls without all the time asking himself any questions. A PUA is therefore higher in this scale because he “controls” the whole process from A to Z. However, in time, we become a Natural, even if our game loses a bit of its spice: by not controlling everything, we certainly have a little less performance but at least it is more authentic and it is not too much a headache. The goal of the pickup is to become ourselves but the ” alpha ourselves ” that is successful with women and in life in general, this time. Not the “victim ourselves”. We become a stronger man, for us and for women.

We are not bastards nor consanguineous oxen, as some like to believe. But that, they will never know because the morons will never read this text until the end. And you ?

 

Carpe Diem

Carpe diem is a Latin phrase taken from a poem by Horace that in English is translated as “Seize the present day without worrying about tomorrow.” It summarizes the poem that precedes it in which Horace tries to persuade Leuconoe to enjoy the present moment and to draw all the joys, without worrying neither about the day nor the hour of her death.

Made famous to the general public since ancient times, the extract Carpe diem has been misinterpreted: translated “Enjoy the present day” (when both words mean “seize the day”) and understood as an incentive for the stronger hedonism, perhaps the most blind, he lost all connection with the original text which instead encourages to enjoy the good times (but challenge any discipline of life) with the idea that the future is uncertain and that everything will disappear.

Living more in mode “carpe diem” is the advice I was given the most by various psychologists that I saw when I was very anxious.

 

Hedonism

Hedonism is a Greek philosophical doctrine that says the pursuit of pleasure and avoidance of displeasure are the goals of human existence.

The pleasures of life, are multiple and vary among individuals according to their education. Hedonists thinkers have shaped their lives according to their own disposals but there are common themes: friendship, tenderness, sexuality, the pleasures of the table, conversation, a constant search for life pleasures, a body in good health. We can also find among the disposals: the nobility of soul, knowledge and science in general, reading, arts practice and physical exercise, social well-being…

At the same time, the pain and displeasure to avoid are: conflicting relationships and proximity to people without contractual capacity (without words), the debasement and humiliation, submission to an imposed order, violence, deprivation and frustrations justified by fables, etc.

Thus, there is no personal hedonism without discipline, without asceticism, without self-knowledge and knowledge of the world and others. Direct foundations of a hedonistic philosophy are curiosity and taste for life on one hand, and on the other hand the autonomy of thought (not the belief), knowledge and experience of the real (instead of faith). So there are a lot of similarities with the game in there!

According to Michel Onfray, hedonism is summed up by the maxim of Chamfort: “Enjoy and make people enjoy, without harming neither you, nor anyone, that is I think the whole morality”.

Religions do not like this philosophy of life in general because it promotes sex outside marriage and can disrupt the established order. But hey, wasn’t sex forbidden by religions especially for hygienic measures? The texts have not been updated for a while, but it seems to me that with the condoms, those rules have no place to be now! Finally, because we do positive things for us and for others, I do not see who it could disturb or what can make of us a bad person in this life philosophy. That said, by freeing so many invisible bonds, we feel a lot better… so why would one even want to make bad things around after ?

 

What is the link with seduction?

This type of philosophy allows you to relax and have no regrets. It puts at the center the tangible: the present. Indeed, one does not live yesterday or tomorrow. We live now… it is pure logic but it is too often forgotten.

Regretting things does not change them, being anxious thinking of the future will not help much either. Accept that you cannot change the past nor fully anticipate the future. Thinking, it’s good, but if it prevents the action, then it is totally counter-productive. So let’s avoid over-thinking because often it makes you disagree with your deep desires (I’m still talking about good desires not about desire of murdering your boss)!

Living by thinking less about stressful issues will make us more attractive because there will be less pressure and people will feel it. We will be cooler, less boring (avoid excess anyway). We will live more !

Do you know that 95% of the thoughts that most people have today are the same as they had yesterday and as they will have tomorrow (80% of negative thoughts in an average person) ? There’s so little new, adventures and fun in people’s lives… Most people believe they live but they are already dead.

During a date, do not try to prepare the next 35 possible topics of conversations in your mind, do not anticipate the 73 shit-tests you fear she uses, and finally do not spend all your time analyzing her body language. This will make the interaction more authentic. Wanting to complicate things may reassure you because you seem to have some control acting like that … but in fact this is not the case! Especially in the game. And I would even say that “doing too much” plays against you in fact! Like any excess.

 

And sex in it?

Using a little the “carpe diem” pattern can convince chicks to have fun with you in a hot night. This kind of lines helped me to fuck a lot. I also use it to answer the question “what kind of relationship do you expect” (I explain that I take what life gives me, I have no particular expectation and I’m glad if I can live nice experiences). But so far it is not dishonest nor manipulating, because I just sincerely share with them my vision of life … and I see if they are wise enough to share it with me.

We often hear things like “live every day like if it was the last” or other advice that is analogous. But in fact, it’s so much obvious… that no one believes in it! Why postponing constantly potential parties of pleasure? Knowing that a brick can fall on your head at any time and kill you (touch wood so it will not happen to us).

Why postponing a date or a fuck if the two protagonists feel like it now? It defies logic, actually. The stress ? The principles ? We had planned to do something for work that we could very easily do another day ? All this has much less importance facing death but as we live in an overprotected society, most people see on the very long-term before seeing their short-term interests.

“And if, later
People wanted to know my stories
How many will be worth, really worth to be told? “
Casseurs Flowters

For example, a girl who says she’s looking for “a serious relationship.” OK, that’s very good. But in the meantime waiting she finds the man of her life, what prevents her seizing the opportunities that actually present to her with men she likes that will not judge her but do not feel like engaging themselves in something immediately ? Why frustrating the natural needs of our body while it would be a win-win scenario to do otherwise? Why spoiling our life voluntarily if we can help it?

Anyway, if during the sex the girl will already be thinking that after she will feel dirty for being “easy”, it’s not even worth it. Sure there is some work to do on ourselves upstream before enjoy a little the good things of life. A work of presence, a work for getting free from our social conditioning, etc.

I conclude by reminding you that carpe diem does not mean irresponsible. So especially if you have a lot of one night stands or several partners, protect yourself.

“But the years go by quickly, and even the strongest eventually fall
In all our adventures, many times will ultimately mean
If I had to leave, I would love to have more stories to tell”
Casseurs Flowters

Some of my readers have seen in Secrets for seducing on the Internet or in my Diary that I am able to wet a girl (on a dating site or by texts) just by writing her an erotic text.

Then, often, those women come to me or invite me home and we fuck after a few minutes because they are hot and have the impression of having already enjoyed with me … since the text puts both of us on stage.

So my readers want to do the same. But when they try to do the same, it makes stuff like, “I’ll lick 3 minutes and you will enjoy very strong and I will put my dick in your ass.” I’m hardly exaggerating. Seriously, is this supposed to be exciting?

Putting the idea of ​​sex with you in her mind is a very good strategy (it can be done in many other ways than through literature, through humor as example). But we must do it in a correct way.

So I will now give you 10 tips to improve your erotic short stories.

1/ Think of the five senses

Give the sensations a special place. Emotions are queens in seduction. How do you feel when you’re turned on ? Are you cramped in your jeans? How do you know she will soon orgasm? Do her legs tremble thoroughly while her abs are contracting? Play with her breath, ger cries, the undulation of her hips, etc. For more realistic details, feel free to read The awesome lover’s manual !

For your descriptions of sex scenes, you need to use with emphasis hearing, touch, smell, sight and taste. It doesn’t really matter if you use present, future or past. But do not mix tenses.

2/ Styling a little your text

Feel free to play with metaphors, double meanings and connotations.

And diversify your vocabulary to don’t be redundant. It is too easy to always use the same words like “scream” or “orgasm”…

3/ Avoid cliché

Pay attention to your choice of words so it will not look obscene nor ridiculous, which would be counterproductive.

Do not overuse phrases like “fuck my pussy” or “drink my wet.” Admittedly, in the action, words like that can be delivered so they are not completely banished … but use it sparingly. Instead: stay polite, courteous and respectful even when you describe a violent doggy with spanking and hair pulling.

4 / Stay realistic

It is better to talk about what you know. Remember your own sex sessions, your own feelings and observations in order to be as authentic as possible. Write unpretentiously but stay exciting. Embellish a little reality, of course, you have to make her dream a little!

If you do not know your sexuality, get inspired by my erotic texts (in A story of cyprine (love juice)) to see what it should look like.

Stay realistic also on the proportions of your sex and your endurance level. Same thing for the girl, if you have not slept with her yet, do not put her under pressure by letting her think that you expect she makes crazy performances.

5/ The length of the text

To get into the action, you need the text to be relatively long and detailed. It is necessary that we feel the rise of desire. For this, do not forget to describe kissing and preliminaries. But do not make it too long either, at the risk of discouraging her reading. 2 or 3 pages on Word, it’s good!

6/ Details

Correctly describe the context. Where does the action take place ? At your house ? At her place ? In a car ? On a couch? One night ?

Thinking course to gestures that seem insignificant you might: they graze? Interlace their fingers? In these moments, these details are important. Give your reader want to live those magical moments with you.

7/ Narrative not teaching

When you read an erotic text, you do not want to read a biology textbook not to see the details in close-up like in a porn. Mechanics, we do not really care in those moments.

If your character is just going back and forth during half a page, it will be boring. Take her rump, grab her hands, block her face against the pillow to stimulate her ! (Don’t be too dominating if you do not know her yet.)

8/ Orgasm

Remember to make orgasms more intense than the rest. All these frictions and these indecent fondling, is to get there (one or more times). Also describe the thoughts that go through you in this situation.

9/ After sex

Your text will reveal her a little more about you. About post-sex, why not taking a shower together after some discussion, both lying on the bed?

Reassure her, this is not a protocol you write, just an idea of how things could happen when you’ll meet up (again or for the first time).

10/ Proofreading

Once your sex scene finished, read it aloud to judge not only its sensuality, but also its credibility! If imagining these things gives you a beginning of erection, it’s good. The goal is still to wet her, if she is in a favorable context (therefore suggest her reading it rather at night after returning home or something like that).

Change words when there are repetitions, purify by removing heavy parts, tweak… and especially check the spell at least a minimum with automatic correction (eg Word).

Go for it ! Make the France wet !!!

Here is a case that comes up regularly: you picked up a chick and she has agreed to meet up with you… let’s say in one week. What should you do in the meantime to keep the flame? How to maintain her interest until the day of the appointment?

The wrong strategy

I think, and experience shows that agreeing on a date and an hour in a long time : it’s not enough to consider that the game is won.

What I mean is that stopping “keeping the feet warm” of the girl, during the time you’re waiting for the hot date is a bad idea because she may interpret it like : the commitment no longer stands.

It can work all the same, with some chicks highly motivated or with chicks who organize their lives a long time in advance. However, from experience, I do not advise to do it. The most common case is that she will forget it or will zap you during this week of waiting. Keep your eyes open, then!

Let’s see what you can do to maximize the chances she comes at the rendezvous in one week.

I take this opportunity to remind you that a girl who agrees for a date “next time” did not give you any appointment. We need the commitment to be clear and precise to think we have something strong. Do not be a spare wheel !!!

Sometimes it makes more sense to keep you mouth shut when you got an date. But it’s especially for dates that will take place “soon-now.” To avoid saying a bullshit.

 

The best scenario

The best scenario is, of course, when you share a great connection together, the conversation via texts or on chatting while waiting to meet up is fluent. These relationships are like evidence. They present no particular difficulty.

But when this is not going by itself or when one is busier than the other: this can cause problems. “Doing too much” requires a lot of energy and by doing that, you also take the risk of saying something stupid that will make us look “weird.” This is the problem sometimes: we want to make the shot, but in fact we often screw it up. On your side, while awaiting the appointment : stay simple and alpha.

 

The best compromise

The good compromise, in my opinion, is to answer her once or twice every day or every second day. It allows to have every time things relatively interesting to say. To stay in the newsfeed of his life. And especially to don’t be too needy, to don’t invade her.

Of course, do not bother to tell the girl when you will answer and why. Let her wait for the answer. Do not be a fucking AFC who is too afraid of offending his target for some shitty reasons. We can say that you will act like a little girl: you will learn how to make her want you and how to make her miss you 😉

If she is what comes over you, beware! Is she lacking of affection? Must see what is behind her behaviour : the love at first sight is rare but needy or low self-esteem chicks are not… and that can be really a pain in the ass to manage them. Sometimes it is better to next in these cases, even though it would be an easy shot, to avoid future inconveniences.

There’s also this solution : send ready-made routines like “so what color are your underwear today” every morning. Or send her an erotic text every day to keep the mood (from your collection already written of course).

Therefore this time interval can be used to create comfort and make them want to fuck you at the first date. You thus need time to get the date, but you can win at this game if you handle this delay in a good way.

On the other hand : not enough comfort or talking too hard about sex with a girl who is stressed by it, and you take this risk : she will maybe flake, as explained in the following diagram (stress : good or bad stimulation) :

Not enough stress bores you. Too much stress inhibits you. Optimal stress turns you on.

Sexual connection: what do I mean?

I do not speak here of the “emotional connection” that makes the girl feel good with you (comfort phase). I speak indeed of a “sexual connection”: this is the name I give to this indescribable thing that makes your body and hers getting along famously (or not).

I just searched the web but I have not found anything about it there. So either I am completely wrong or Google misguided me (on the chakras) or I will highlight something that the PUA community has missed so far. Whatever actually matters is that YOU become aware that IT exists.

Have you ever fucked a girl you barely know, but you could feel a fusion torque during sex? During the time your legs were in the air, it was the perfect arrangement like if both of you shared the same body.

To me, a very strong sexual connection approaches the passion and avoids that one gets bored in bed. It’s creates the fact that we all the time desire the other one. That you do not get tired despite his or her flaws.

 

Can we predict that we will have a good sexual connection?

I do not think you can predict in advance with who you will have a super sex session or not (I do not speak from a technical point of view). Sometimes I have been surprised : the girls on who I would not have bet, shy or virgin, but I had that je ne sais quoi that drove me crazy. That je ne sais quoi would also probably left another man marble.

I also sometimes fucked hot babes without wanting to see them again. This is not related to physical appearance. This is a need you feel or not (and not a lack of sex).

 

Is this sexual connection necessary to orgasms?

The sexual connection is not required to give chicks orgasms. It is not essential to have good sex either. But, it is essential for having a very awesome sex session and for wanting to fuck and fuck again and again the girl.

To give orgasms, a good technique, putting the girl at ease, or the only state of mind of the girl may be enough.

 

Sexual connection and technique

I do not think the sexual connection is related to the technique. I sometimes had very good sexual connection with inexperienced girls… but not with libertines.

When these libertines sucked me it was good (better than a lost night watching TV) but there was not yet that little spark, that little extra something that makes that we could fuck all night without getting tired.

 

Are there other types of connections?

I think so. I’ve loved spending time (and sleeping) with girls with whom sex was not great. Yet the simple contact with their pussy and something was going on between us. I already had brain connections, neurotic connections, unhealthy connections, etc.

I also had outright sexual connections with girls with who I shared neither the lifestyle nor the opinions, nor anything at all … And yet, I have never regretted having done these experiments. I think we try too much to rationalize or analyzing sex. While these urges are stronger than us. Maybe are we just too scared to admit it? That chance is stronger than our will.

 

How to tell if you have a good sexual connection with the girl?

Talking is not enough. From experience, I have told you, I have often been surprised: great sex with almost unknown or seedy sex with a girl I dated three times before.

The thing is that a sexual connection can make you or her want to know the other person better after sleeping with him or her. Like, you don’t give a shit about her, you fuck her… and it’s so awesome in bed that you are seriously interested in the girl after.

I would say thanks to learning than by being more open rather than being defensive, you are more likely to experience powerful sexual connections (it must be that someone takes the first step). We could have with many people (we are made for that) but never with everyone. Chicks want to choose to whom they give power over them.

 

Is the sexual connection always reciprocal?

I do not think so. It happened I have loved fucking chicks that did not wish to see me again after. I have often been contacted again by girls because they had enjoyed it while on my side, I did not want to do it again with them. Ultimately, I was glad to have done a good deed for them but I did not want to see them again. No matter how hot they were or how they were invested in bed… It may seem unfair, I realize, but it’s like that.

I think there are energies circulating among humans, “good chemistry” some people say. Well, these connections may exist only on a sexual level. But the best is when there is ALSO a brain connection.

 

Where are the sexual connections coming from ?

I often wondered and the truth is that I don’t know. The universe? Past lives?

More rationally, I think there are factors that do not depend on us. I think it was Freud who said that similar neuroses attract. Then, there may be hormones in general and in particular pheromones that can also play a role here.

 

Does everyone know what that connection is?

Like I have said, a strong sexual connection seems indescribable: it looks like the obvious but remains inexplicable. I have serious trouble to ask over words so feel free to help me in the comments.

I think most people do not know it in their lives. Most people are, anyway, committed in by default relations. They sometimes suffer more than they live a fulfilling relationship.

Most people know nothing about the art of sex, or it is never spontaneous, or it is mechanical or chaste, etc.

 

What is the interest to find a girl with whom there is a strong sexual connection?

First, I said that sexual connection may be there, but to varying degrees. But the best is when it is very strong. It seems to me the equivalent of those people who understand each other without having to talk.

Then I think you will understand when you will live it (do not confuse it with a one itis : sexual connection is something rare). That is when sex WITH HER will be irresistible for you.

I soon get tired of women in general. It is the novelty that excites me, motivates me. I happened I had regular girlfriends, who managed to drive me crazy even though they do not offer me this novelty anymore.

They always and spontaneously wanted to make me happy, and it was mutual.

They gave me priority over other men with whom sex necessarily lost a lot of attractions.

Science has proven that there is a clear link between the quality of sex and the level of interest of a woman for a man, the hormones released by the brain after orgasm are also those that induce the feeling of love .

 

Warning :

When I started, I was in couple just to be a couple. I fucked with chicks I dreamed cheating on because… I was hard mechanically and not by genuine desire for HER. I had experienced nothing yet and I believed I was arrived.

“All I know is that I know nothing.” Socrates