French Pick Up Artist

August 31st 2014,

I’m still having a hard time. I would even say that I’m sinking more and more into the darkness day after day. Fortunately, a girl on Snap sends me photos of her perfect ass, that keeps me alive. A short brown haired nurse with blue eyes, with a really hot body like that, it is a real delight for the eyes that would make a dying become hard.

Even in the agony, I pick up apparently relatively effectively on the Internet, it is comforting! And I really need it at the moment (ie comfort) because the simple fact of typing a message on FB is a considerable effort for me at the moment. I am too under tension thus I am going to lodge a complaint against EDF (electricity company in France)!

Every day I have the impression that my future conjugates in the past, that I am going to die and that tomorrow will not exist. It is hard (and I’m not speaking about my sex for once)! There will be plenty of girls around my coffin there, as young people say, but have the decency to don’t try to pick up my ex at my funeral PLEASE otherwise I will come back haunting you (I don’t even know if a lot of them will come anyway – girls respect nothing anymore nowadays). I remember every morning with nostalgia my very first moments when I was just a carefree pre-genius. So, enjoy life before death put it deeply in our ass. Especially if you plan to have the politeness to don’t last long. “Tell me grandma, why do I have the impression that life is less good than when you were young ? Why do everything seem fake on Facebook?”

1/ Three weeks of waiting to have an appointment with the gastroenterologist. It was very long (more than me in missionary), especially in such a condition. He received me five minutes, hardly touched my stomach and declared “it’s stress, €50 PLZ.” It speaks for itself. He declared me that I was put under stress for my exams in October… while exams have never put me under stress like that but well the guy knows you better than yourself you know just because he has a bac+8 diploma. I threw his prescription to the trash and refused to shake hands with him by leaving.

2/ For my rates of adrenalin and dopamine that make break the score, the internal doctor of the hospital sounded me and everything and advised me to don’t make the scintigraphy finally. For him too, the cause, it is the anxiety. Definitely, this shitty thing explains everything according to doctors. I am persuaded that I am going to die and they all answer me “we all die one day anyway“… yeah OK if you say so but I don’t know for you but me I still have a lot of hot girls to screw !!!

By experience of consciousness, he prescribed:
– A blood test: NOTHING except a deficiency in vitamin D (like everybody according to him) and a liver vaguely out off standards… But nothing that justifies such an ill-being. One more who directs me to the psychiatrist. He thinks that I am into a depression. Great, but without reason?!
– A electroencephalogram: NOTHING.
– A test of effort and a holter to see if my heart goes well (in September).

Padawan tells me that it serves me right, that everything is the fault of my liver, that it’s because I have drunk alcohol when I was younger. Yes, yes, stay in your crazy by thinking you are smarter than everybody! The guys addicted to organic food have the impression that they are going to take away death with their lifestyle but well… It is just for feeling reassured and having a clear conscience because we can die from a lot of different manners.

6ft visited me at the hospital because she knew that I was enormously stressed. My parents were there too. My father had difficulty in recovering from it “fuck son… she is so… cute.
– I know.”

3/ The brother of Padawan has a friend he describes as brilliant, who practice holistic medicine and cellular reprogramming, and who cured him. Padawan tells me that he too much wants to go there but that he will go later (he says the same thing for everything, it was already the case for the cure of the liver in February, and in the end he never makes nothing). One saying, this guy was in a wheelchair without reason and now he is cured and became a sportsman. Even if I had no proofs of that, I decided to give it a try. What I did not know at that time, it is that there are cases of psychosomatic paralysis: thus, being persuaded that our medicine is going to cure us… actually cures us. The problem is that I don’t really believe in it thus if it is really just a placebo effect, that is not going to work on me. Paradoxically, I am too much afraid of the nocebo effect: that my heart stops alone without good reason just because I am afraid that it stops. Yes, I am conscious that I’m making a kind of bad trip without drug but that is not enough to take me out of it. And those who speak to me about lack of will can go fuck themselves! Hormones govern us that’s it. If that happens to you one day to be in this condition (I do not wish it to you), you will understand, otherwise it is impossible to imagine.

The guy took my pulse during 1 hour while approaching things. According to how pulse reacts, according to him, it is that my body speaks to say if it likes this or that. His diagnostic: I have no allergy but I still eat too much butter (awesome)… and I have a problem at the emotional level since I’m 12. And to scare me a bit more, he specified that it is the noradrenalin and that it is a problem at the level of the pineal gland (“the third wasted eye”). The kind of thing doctors never look of course because it is expensive, an MRI. €60 for that, I am perplexed. He tells me that my body needs prickly pear because my liver is attacked by Montsanto’s Round-Up. He sells me tablets without gluten of that as a wonderful cure… €50. Then, Padawan tells me that it is the doctors who have agreements with pharmaceutical labs… pff. All the sames. Long live Hypocrite’s oath. One evening, I tried to take a tablet of that and BAM: anxiety attack! I put myself in the head that I was just going to poison myself because it was not a natural thing. It is astounding, especially that I am conscious that there are people out there who are full of LSD or cocaine and who do not die for all that. Before, I took medicines, it was not a problem at all and now I can swallow no chemical thing anymore… seeing frequently the followers of the organic food at the taekwondo is undoubtedly not good at all for me!!! That just makes me feel guilty when I eat badly. In fact these people always have an explanation for everything : if you don’t feel good it’s because you didn’t eat this or did not do that or didn’t see this magical healer. Even one told me that it was like that because I had eaten tomatoes and melon during the same meal and that mixed badly in the stomach but yes!!! Other than that, our ancestors stuffed insects in the mud… An organic cup of tea and systematic moods… Fuck off!

My father had accompanied me because I was really bad and because it was really far. He really found him weird. According to him, he is a quack who takes advantage of my condition. Maybe, but I am so discouraged that I don’t know what to do anymore…

To note that this guy stopped exercising his activity a few weeks after my visit. While he pretended stars came from Paris to see him to be healed because he is a magician… Ah really ?! Not very coherent all this.

The brother of Padawan, by learning the diagnostic of his buddy, advised me another “magician” who removes the emotional problems by magnetism. Yeah well, kiss my ass now…

4/ I visited a priest exorcist. He told me a little what he saw in his career, that makes one think. I have no symptom of possession but he made me all the same a prayer of liberation in case I had a curse (evil spell) on me.

5/ I kept the best for the end. A friend of my mother came home this summer. By seeing me in this condition, she told me that she recognized herself because she felt the same thing some years ago. She explained me that her condition was due to the soul of her husband who was stuck to her and that a medium-shaman-healer had taken it away for her and that she had left by jumping as a kid.

In the point where I was there, I thus visited this famous shaman. By seeing me arriving, he told me “you are a pigeon (maybe because I came to see him) and you’re lacking of confidence“. I said no. He said yes. “Everybody uses you and everything you are too much of a St Bernard“. He is a little right there all the same, as a result, I decided not to dispose anymore of my digital products (which are all the same quality works – I spent many working hours on this stuff) and not to give any more too many things free of charge on my blog (it is necessary to help others but it is necessary to command respect for it too). I write obscenities for fun but I am too much of a kind teddy bear who risks to be used by birds of prey if I continue… I knew already it at the bottom of me but becoming aware of it and knowing that that is quite obvious it is hard. Always making the others come before you and rarely falling on people like you (thus being used) that wears you out! I look for reciprocity and people on whom I can count & who can count on me. I’m not asking for the moon all the same!!! I am too much an emotional sponge.

Then, he asked me “did somebody died because of the heart in your family ?” I answered “my grand-father when he was 96” and there I started trembling in a uncontrollable way and crying. He took my hand and advised me to let him leave. I left for cramps and then my mouth said on its own “WHAT AM I DOING HERE“… The clairvoyant sketched a small smile and confirmed me that Gaston had left. I felt so alone of a sudden…

It is true that the day before the day when my grandfather died, everybody went to say goodbye to him at the hospital because we suspected that he would not spend the night (he was not really conscious). But I was not able to. I was sick a little bit then I used it as an excuse to don’t go there. I did not accept his departure. I loved him too much, he was my model. At the same time physically (we looked alike / he was from what I know a very horny devil) and morally (he was straight and honest/he took 3 jobs to buy a house and raise his family – where we are now, we largely owe it to him). Apparently, he loved me enormously in return so his soul did not agree to leave without saying goodbye to me. As a result, according to this theory, I would have had death in me and would have got his fear in me (he made three infarcts thus he could be afraid of making one at any time), what explains my rather violent thoracic pains and in the arm too.

We chatted a little while the cramps became blurred. The shaman told me that I had no disease but that my energetic body was back to front. However, now, it was going to go back in place little by little. I rocked actually for a few days after that, while soaking in a sensation of total unreality. I a little told him my life, spoke to him about what torments me and the bad things I did in this life (I had by the way written an article on this matter in my previous Diary). Nothing very nasty according to him.

He told me that I am a very old soul. Apparently, there are tracks of that in our genetics and in the memory of the water of our body… blah-blah. Needs not to try too much to understand otherwise that remove all the magic of the trick. In another life, you should know I was part of the power in an Asian country… and after that I had a bad karma because I would have made people kill. For my punishment, I died in the war and things like that during several “embodiments”. And there, in my last life, I was a maffioso who enjoyed cheating to cards then I was shot down. Now, I do not have karma anymore (neither good nor bad) so it’s up to me (I have everything to make a success of my life)! This makes me want to become good, virtuous and irreproachable.

Before leaving, he also told me that the heart attack was a part of my range of possibilities but that he had taken it away. But, I should not think about it anymore so that it doesn’t come back in my fate. The shamans have for belief that the fear of the disease, led the disease.

One week later, I got better but I was not cured. Then, little by little, I dived back into my catastrophic condition. In psychology, we could say that he tried to make me do my mourning by strength and that the rest is the fruit of an anxiety attack + my imagination. He is or actually a clairvoyant and there is a lot of things that are unknown in this world (but that too much frightens me) or he is a very good cold-reader and he is able to read people in two seconds. In any case, mediums generally always talk about three universal problems: love / sex, money / work and health. There, at least, we weren’t in the cliché!

Anyway, we will know all this only at the time of our death. Moreover, the shaman told me that I was hyper sensitive, hyper susceptible, and that doubtless, I could “see” too if I worked just a little bit this gift. Awwww it is not the first time that people tell me that then that scares me!!! I really don’t want that ghosts come talking to me! At the moment, what I know it is that that it has again costed an arm and a leg to me this story!

Thus to note that he also said wrong things like for example that I had a younger sister but who would have refused to be embodied in my mother who would have had a miscarriage and thus sista would have been reincarnated in the boxer who wants my skin. According to these people, everything happens for a reason. But the thing is, I asked my mother and she has never had any miscarriage….

6/ The buddy of Padawan, Le Gothique, swallowed a entire tube of Lexomil this month because a girl preferred to go back with her ex rather than to be with him. It was not even a call for help it was a desperate need to draw the attention. At the hospital, they made him a wash of stomach then interned him in psychiatry. He is there for several weeks. It frightens me, I hope I won’t get to this point !!! And especially, this is what can happen because of girls so if you are an AFC take care of yourself, please, on this blog! 😉

Fortunately, my darling Virginie takes care of me during this delicate period. I don’t know how she can tolerate to have a boyfriend in this condition but fortunately that she is here for me!!! She tells me that it’s the least she can do… yeah, but the truth is that around me everybody goes away. I really fell on a rare pearl, who loves me for what I am. That is the way it is: when you don’t feel good, everybody distances themselves. Only real friends stay. And among the real ones, I notice that my brother did not call once this summer to know how I’m going (my brother says that I am being dramatic and that I am a useless person thus it is a little bit easy… I have even the impression that he is happy that I feel bad because that consolidates him in his mediocrity… I think it’s a shame to get to this point within a sibship) and Padawan when he calls me it is just for talking to me about his attempts of trying to pick up (I really have the impression to serve only to make him fuck). Hafid it’s OK. Some other friends also but really that’s not a lot. The fingers of a hand. Moreover I send to the others my middle finger.

Well well, I guess that I tried a little all the parallel types of medicine thus now, if I want to heal… I have to trust a little more science and conventional doctors. I am going to start with a psychotherapist (practitioner EMDR). We will see ! There, I am hypersensitive, I have difficulty in trusting whoever it is, I am so to speak, lost.

May the God of the Health be with us… otherwise it’s impossible to have a good Game!

July 31st 2014,

This story requires an introduction. I don’t remember if I have already talked to you about my older brother. My bro, as the kids say nowadays. Who is in fact my half-brother, other son of my father. I think that I did, but briefly. I am thus going to develop a little.

He is in a way my opposite. He is 6ft3 and for something like 221 pounds. He smokes 3 packs a day, drinks 2 apéritifs a day, does not go in for sport, likes criticizing everybody, is totally wild (he almost never gets out of his house), fucks only fat or old women and in any case rarely (we hear a lot about it). It’s not that he does not like the hot chicks, I can sometimes see him staring at them, but I guess that he is afraid of them. It is unfortunately the case of many men. However he rejects with violence any conversation about seduction (he is stubborn) and thinks what I write on my blog is not possible thus is a lie (limiting beliefs).

One day, he said that he wanted to take woman who would be lower than him in every respect. To dominate her. That shocked me because I’m the very opposite: I would like to take woman who is superior to me (or at least who completes me effectively)… This is why I make all this personal fulfillment. So, my children would be an improved version of me. Well, I hope!

Two years ago, he decided to get married. He thus registered on Meetic. He met a 40-year-old girl (older than him) with a strong accent from Marseille then unsubscribed. He warned me “she is not a hottie“. Actually, I was shocked when I met her. Not specially ugly commonplace face but really fat and thus with puffy cheeks, a fat ass and very hanging udders. The worst: she is not intelligent. I still remember the first time when we ate together: she said something like “Léo diCaprio if he came over he would not sleep in the bathroom“. My brother answered “yeah but I would kill him in that case.” Seriously how submitted : it is the girl the idiot not Léo diCaprio. And what a ridiculous conversation as if the actor would be interested in her! As for myself I don’t care about the life of the celebrity! And the wallpaper of the phone of his girl is a picture of Taylor Lautner topless in the rain, she doesn’t stop saying “ohhh he is sooooo handsome, don’t you think ???” Seriously everytime I wanna answer “heuuuu… I don’t care in fact how old are you seriously you look like a backward teenager“. But I contain myself : even if my father is disappointed too, the instruction of the patriarch is to do like if we liked her (because the mother of my brother already tried the frankness she told him that she was ugly and that if he married her she would disinherit him, the result was that he does not speak to her any more for 1 and a half year and insult her cheerfully in front of us.) Because my brother is a big idler he married the first one he met on the Internet, by ease. He justified the whole with a “I love her” and both overplay every time they are called “Heart, Love, etc.” Ridiculous !!! Well well… this is just my opinion. I wonder what he will answer when his kid will ask him how they met…

Now, the fat is pregnant but does not want to stop smoking (but she absolutely does not want to drink a drop of alcohol). When my brother asked her to stop: she answered that it was dangerous to stop. True story! Who wears the pants? As a result, he did not stop either. Seriously, that is what happens when you marry idiots: they dominate you because are lazy and understand nothing. You can tell them nothing nor make them understand anything, it’s serious !!! Besides, she and her mother say 100 times the same looped thing it is boring, it is agreed speech, it is some shit. The worst it is when his girl plays h2g “yeah I met a very handsome model on Meetic me“… what she does not say it is that the guy if he has a little of common sense and is not starved he ran away.

I hope that the baby will not be malformed because my brother begged me almost on his knees to be the godfather (after having thrown me a sandwich of I don’t remember what in the face by telling me “eat it is organic and you are too skinny“). Seriously, I’m sick of it. I am not very keen on but how to refuse (we inculcated me to never say no to family) ? I not at all want to oversee a boy who will be raised by an intellectually limited woman and her mother who speaks hardly French (because yeah they are in a ménage à trois since they moved together and there is a dog too, a long-haired yucky thing that looks like a cat and shits in the lounge: my brother kicks him with feet to play the tough person). Seriously, this girl thinks that with her BTS(TWO-YEAR TECHNICAL DEGREE) secretariat she is the most intelligent of the world and criticizes her colleagues and bosses (of the city hall of Marseille). And him, wishes that his son (because they is out of the question that it is a girl you understand) is a man a real one and thus he plans well to inculcate him the following values: tough education, alcohol, fag, racism, misogyny, vulgarity, being slanderous and official hypocrite.

I swear you: my brother is a champion of vulgarity. He worked a few years as truck driver while he has a master’s degree in law, just saying! Now, he works in a management agent and adores calling people to charge them, abuse them and sometimes send the bailiff to them. He always pushes away all what is culture. Sometimes he bawls above me as if I was still 8 years old (we have a ten years old difference).

I think that he is sorely lacking confidence and thus compensates for all this with a disproportionate pride and a wickedness to everybody. He is certainly very conceited because he allows to criticize everybody (we feel reassured as we can). But at the same time, when we have a woman like that, we cannot brag !!! It is not credible!!! The worst is when I introduce them to hot girls (hotter than her in any case), they both always criticize them.

His wife is really kind of girl who says this kind lousy saying “it is those who speak about it most who make it least“… heu lol me I talk about it and I do it. If they say so it is often because it is their own case to talk about it but to do nothing in fact. And in any case, these guys we unmask them (it is the principle of the shit-test) and then even it is ridiculous if after they’ve slept with a girl after having said that are hopeless in the bed in fact. Once she was shocked just by a joke I had made : her best friend took plane then I had asked if she had reached the seventh sky. HOW SHOCKING ! Idem, when I speak a little about sex (sweetened version) she answers “Ah but me I am not like that eh if you try to fuck me in the street or in your car you never see me again…
– Good because I absolutely don’t want you.” This kind of aggressive speech is held most of the time by girls who are not confident thus they want to develop loyalty of the guy before by the desire before giving him some sex (do not be dependent on a girl for your sexuality). They do not think that they can keep him without keeping him waiting or using other shitty strategies. It is really pathetic! My brother listens carefully then judges like a nice guy to align with her ideas (I think that he is a little bit jealous but does not absolutely want to question himself). Once she saw a picture of Padawan she exclaimed “HIM HE NEEDS PICK UP LESSONS ? HE IS SO HANDSOME OHHH”… Well yeah seen how girls work, he really needs it. Moreover in front of him even if she was young, beautiful and single she would certainly have been a pain in the ass. With lousy principles or I know not what but well that does not prevent her in the abstract from judging like that!!! What irritates me the most is the bullshit!

Now, his last lousy idea is to buy (while he is already put into debt for his car) a ruined house in the Var and to ask me to help him to repair it. A very yucky thing in a hole lost at 45mn of his work (thus 1:30 am of highway a day for him and 1 hour for her) when he would live with his wife, his mother-in-law (Armenian cleaning lady) and the future baby whose first name is kept secret (so I fear the worst).

Finally here we are, he so much repeated to me that the obese girls are awesome that I decided to try. After all, we cannot say that we do not like something before having tasted, normally. I belonged on holidays to Saint Martial in Ardèche (I like very much the kayak) and I had Adopt on my phone. I thus looked for a fat very yucky not far away from my position. Something like a 3/10 (I rarely do below 7 sometimes 6 if really she has some charm or if the context is favorable to her eg an alcoholic party). If possible susceptible like the other one, just to repeat the pattern. I found some… let’s say that with every sausages they eat in these mountains it helps!!!

I met one by getting invited at her place directly “thanks to” the technique I teach in my ebook about online seduction.

I seriously think that it is the worst idea I have ever had in my life. Frankly, I knew it that being curious, experimenter, tolerant, comprehensive and especially to try to understand people different from me was going to play tricks on me some day.

At her place, on her sofa, I looked at her and thought only of clearing off. Especially that, she bragged. It was unbearable. Already that when a girl has enough for her to brag it is boring but in her case it was too annoying. Then, I know well that she overcompensated but that irritated me. “Do I tell her why I am here in fact or what ?! So she finally shuts up ?!” She probably thought that she was going to fuck me no matter what, that it was beforehand won for her… With that said, I have two theories on the fat / ugly:

1/ They less intimidate the guys (the beauty intimidates) thus are more picked up by the average guys. As a result, they get big-headed and think that they do not need to make any effort to be able to be demanding with guys.

2/ They have so much complexes that they do not dare to undress thus are difficult to fuck. I bet that they feel guilty even when they take French fries in the self-service restaurant. But it is not for that that they would question their food / lifestyle. They will say “it is genetic that’s not my fault”… well well, maybe in 1% of the cases. But it is easy to fool yourself!

In brief, I was not able to. I am not nasty then I quickly apologized and cleared off. Yeah, ME FABRICE JULIEN, I got cold feet… but understand me: I am used all the same to quality and there I didn’t want to fall so low. Sorry. I know that she is a human being but she will find another guy to have fun. Seriously, it is not because I am not homophobic that I have to suck cocks. Well, it’s the same thing there… I hope that it was understandable because myself am a little bit vague.

I can already hear politically correct people saying : “yeah but there are countries where fat people are considered as attractive because that evokes wealth and everything“. I shall answer them: In the countries you’re talking about, the people are poor and are ravenous, that’s their biggest danger. In our countries, rich and intelligent people eat well and have the means to take care of them. They are attractive because are in shape, healthy. I don’t think that the prehistoric man was obese: he had not to deal with junk food and had to make efforts to get his food. In our society, sheeps, those who are not endowed with critical mind, the victims of the advertising, and the poor people eat junk food and have a potbelly. In two words: what is attractive, it is the possibility of being a good parent. A man in shape is potentially a better parent than a poor man suffering from malnutrition or who is on the contrary a big bacon full of saturated fatty acids.

Well well, Barney’s rule “for every three 10’s you bang, throw a bone to a 5, they’re grateful and hard working and let’s face it, sometimes you just want to lay there” apparently doesn’t work for me.

May the God of the Game be with all of us !

PS = By the middle of the month, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling very strange. All at once, my heart began accelerating as if it was going to go out of my breast. I was very hot, I perspired and nevertheless I was very cold. Terrifying. I auto-reassured by telling to myself that with all the saunas and every hour of tae kwon do I had made like an animal : I could not die from a heart attack so stupidly in my bed. That eventually stopped and I fell asleep again! The next day, aches everywhere, and palpitations all day long.

I went to a doctor who told me that it was a very powerful anxiety attack. That is linked to my bellyache I have for two months. According to him, I have a functional colonopathy. I looked on the Internet that means everything and nothing. And especially, he gave me no concrete solution but an appointment with a gastroenterologist. The truth is that I did not really accept this diagnosis “what if I had something grave in fact ? he does not even look… it is so easy to say that it is just the stress“. Needs to say that Padawan and his disease of the plot theory had warned me against doctors “yeah they give pills but it is to make us sick in fact they get commissions of labs on every prescription they make, etc.” Heu, my cousin is a doctor she would have told it to me… But well, that made me think all the same and with this kind of thoughts we lose trust in them and in their skills (especially when we have seen them getting drunk in their parties).

Because of my learning of the personal fulfillment, I am in a state of mind of fighter. I thus swore to myself that I was going to give myself the ways to take care of myself. I went to see a étiopathe recommended by 6ft who describes him as a magician of the health. He put back in place my vertebras, made me manipulations for the stomach… well there, I do not have a stomach ache any more. But I still feel strange, I am dizzy and have knocks in the heart. For that, he asked me to make test my rates of catécholamines (blood test and wee-wee in a jar).

As a result: I explode the normal rates of adrenalin and dopamine. I am exceptional. My regular doctor thus sent me to the scanner to see if I had a phéochromocytome. The scanner revealed nothing then he threw in the towel… by directing me all the same to the inner medicine of the hospital of Aix.

He nevertheless suggested me to go to a scintigraphy because according to him if the scanner reveals nothing, the scintigraphy can. Then why did he send me to the scanner first with the horrible injection of iodine that were implied??? Knowing that for the scintigraphy, it would again be necessary to injected me something, a nuclear thing I don’t know what exactly. In brief, I am not keen on and I worry.

Finally here we are. I feel sick, I am tired all the time, I think every day that I am going to die… But I am still there then I look forward to my appointments at the hospital and at the gastroenterologist (but it is long deadlines). I have difficulty in making anything, I am quite weak and I want nothing.

July 11th 2014,

Yesterday, relaxing day (so much the better because at the moment I am strangely exhausted all the time): up by 11 am, small salad of vegetables at noon, and in the afternoon I took the virginity of an inhabitant of Marseille.

I had no more condom then I had to go get some at the Monop’. I went there at about 2:40 pm while I had to meet this 19-year-old sweetheart at 3 pm. I am so far-sighted. I like to go buying condoms and hold them proudly in the store. Many hide because are ashamed to put it on their cock, like the cap we are obliged to wear at the swimming pool, but I am proud because I send to the world the following message “I am about to screw now, and you ?!”

NB : At the risk of not being very original, know that I do not like the AIDS.

Small sensation of breathlessness in the tail to pay, certainly the anxiety otherwise it is because I don’t like paying. No, seriously, I don’t like feeling stuck. Well, then, I hid the box in the inside pocket of my jacket (yeah I had a jacket in the middle of July because it is cold at the moment here). I said to myself that arriving with condoms in a plastic bag would be a little “cheap“. With hindsight, I think that I did well because she asked me in the elevator “what did you buy?” and I didn’t imagine myself answering “some condoms to take your virginity, darling“.

As I was late (it was approximately 3:10 pm), she was sitting down on the ground in front of my building. I sit next to her as a result, to establish a good communication. “Ah, you sit down with me, it is cool“. I gave her an ambiguous kiss on the cheek by way of “hello”. She smiled, cool. I observed and noted that she was dressed like on the photo of Adopt for which I had complimented her. That smelt good. Moreover if you too, you want to take advantage of the Internet for seducing like a bastard, do not hesitate to read my book. I explain to you there quite everything in detail.

Ah because yeah… I didn’t say it yet but I had never seen this girl before. I picked up her on Adopt… When we spoke about sex, she took offence during 2 weeks, then I sent her the message of the last chance about which I speak in my book. As a result : we talk on FB since last Saturday. She lives in Marseille. She told me that she already had tried to sleep with 2 guys this summer but that they were too clumsy and that she wondered who would be able to take her virginity. The first one I don’t remember why they did not do it, I believe that he simply didn’t get hard because of stress, and the second put her a headbutt while they were stark naked (but not quite tanned)… it fucked up everything.

At the time, I wondered if male gente is really SO KNACKERED in the bed or if it was HER who managed to make everybody uncomfortable (because when we are nervous we make bullshit more easily – and we are often nervous when we get ready to sleep with a new person). In brief, she needed somebody to take the virginity of the “indépucelable“, it was a mission for Cyprineman!

To start with, she wanted to go on the balcony, just to get acquainted. I began to make pressing at the end of 10mn. “Yet ?!” she got indignant… she tried to throw me off like a knight during a joust for her beautiful princess Cersei but I know that the kind “we wait just a little then we do it” it is shit… It does not work like that: when needs to go out your comfort zone, it is better to go there sharply (like when you want to break up with your girl). This gossip was an insult for our desire, it was high time to pass in the delicious serious things.

I kissed her (she stopped evading my artless kisses), fiddled, etc. She told me “wait” or held my arm like to accompany me or rather to control my movement. In brief, she was not in confidence. I can understand it. But well. I took the helm firmly, like the Captain Haddock, and I caressed her breasts by over her bra and her pussy by over her string (because she didn’t want that I bring in my hand inside at first). But when she was turned on enough (her emotional part got the upper hand over her logical part) I brought in my hand inside and she did not protest anymore.

In brief, after that, we got back in. We settled down on the sofa: she enjoying because she is totally clitoral… and me by saying to myself that she was cute all the same and that it was thus strange that she is still virgin at her age. But well “plus rien ne m’étonne” (nothing surprises me anymore) as Aurélien says. Usually it is some sublime words that caressed my tongue, there, it was her clitoris.

She rose very high on this sofa… Even if I was not too much able to finger her because that hurt her, my tongue pleased her a lot. And she absolutely wanted “to give me some pleasure too” because she took a lot apparently. Thus we went to the bedroom, I guided her to undress me… She wanted to save time again but the truth it is that she did not really know what to do in this situation then I took time to reassure her and to explain to her. Once naked she panicked ” I don’t know what to do? What must I do? I have to do what?” An attractive small blonde with blue eyes who asks you for that, with her attractive nipples in the air, it is downright sweet.

“Calm down, love! You MUST nothing, you do that you want“. She wanted to give me some pleasure, then I taught her how to shake me. Then, she hesitated one hour before deciding to suck me “I dare or not“, she took my glans in her mouth and made 3 comings and goings “was it good ?
– yes except the hesitation that spoils everything“. Well, will need that she does better than that for her future lovers but for a first time: I found her very brave, of very willingness, and it is the most important for me. What sat her free her it is when I told her “I am your guinea pig today I explain to you so use me to try what you want to discover otherwise you are going to go back home by saying to yourself that you would have wanted to try this or that but you didn’t dare“. Having said that, she did not seem to find that a cock has very good taste then I put her a spanking and she took it badly.

As a result, I redid her a cunni, to make her forgive me. That drove her crazy and after a while “go on dude, we do it now, I so much want to know how it feels“. Ah OK. Well, I’d maybe better continue and make her come with my tongue but I penetrated into her. That hurt her of course. We went there slowly, blah blah blah. We tried several times. That gave her a little pleasure but that still hurt her. At the moment, she wanted that we stop and she shook me to finish me. It was very good: that’s it, she knows how to shake now! “Go on, hug me“. She enjoyed sniffing me in the neck and say “oah you smell good.
– it’s not me it’s Paco Rabanne!”

NB : All this reminded me my own very first time. Except that the girl with whom I made it did not wish to finish me and was very unpleasant. What a silly bitch when I rethink about it!

She told me that she found me “rather” handsome (“sorry I am not used to complimenting “) and very kind. It is good for my confidence. She thought that I would be a jerk but in fact “you rather are a Care Bear“. Yeah, not really either… but well. Apparently I have an image of jerk on my blog, etc. I think that they confuse jerk and alpha, in fact. You can be very kind and alpha… In any case, me, I like helping my neighbor. Especially if it is a girl.

There was a little blood on my bed there when she left, but well. At least I had the honor to take the virginity of a new girl. I hope I have freed her and put her on her good way so that she is happier in her future sexual life. She told me that she had dates next Saturday and Monday with other guys met on Adopt. For my part, I was delighted to discover her 3 attractive tattoos (which just goes to show that all the tattooed are not nymphomaniacs…)

Roughly, she used me as man as a sex object to discover the carnal pleasures. That was not the worst good deed in the world. It was an honorable and delicate mission, but I think of having succeed because she left happy and determined to have fun this summer. I am satisfied because, you know, it is difficult to combine PUA and emotional sentimentality… I’m not kidding, I guess I have too much empathy.

May the God of the Game not put it in our ass !

June 20th 2014,

It is the story of a girl I have poked after the official reception of Les arts et métiers. Found in the list of the event. She did not answer my poke by “who r u / do I no u / y do u pauke me” unlike many illiterates but by “What you write is really cool“. Hell yeah, I have more class than all the high schools of France added up!!! My heart skipped a beat: an attractive girl, a brunette with blue eyes, who flatters me and who in addition likes all my photos… I know plenty men who would have got hard for less than that. Me, I need at least that all the same. 🙂

Almost two months had passed by on the chat and we had still not meet up. Strange, she nevertheless looked motivated and I really felt a good energy between us (yeah I think that it can be felt through the computer because everything is related in the universe). It is necessary to say that at the moment I revise my exam a lot, to don’t miss it again… And with the sport and everything, that does not leave me a great deal of spare time. She, from her part, has other cocks she can jump on during this time thus there was no urgency either on one side or on the other one.

We had to meet last Friday but she had not answered my confirmation message about the time and the place. Her excuse: “You will say thanks to the Facebook messenger app : I had almost no message this week… I have just reinstalled it but I less trust it thus I give you my phone number it is preferable“. I was averagely convinced, used to the chicken excuses of most of the girls who assume nothing, then I sent (with the tact that characterizes me which is btw the main reason why I did not try to be a diplomat) “when do I fuck you ? Storms turn me on. I hope that SFR is not also going to prevent from enjoying together.” She answered “If we have to wait for the next thunderstorms to enjoy together that risks to be long“. This repartee made me hard again. She thus officially invited me to take a hot shower at her place seen that the temperatures fell (and that there was a thunderstorm). Even if after the crazy girl of last time, I was rather afraid of a cold shower, it is all the same the kind of invitation you cannot refuse!

Date fixed yesterday (or rather the day before yesterday because it’s past midnight as I write). I arrived directly at her home by 6:30 pm while I was invited at 6 pm, normal: we lied down on her comfortable bed and we talked. At the end of a few minutes of discussion, I started caressing her leg casually. She caressed my the arm as an answer. We spoke normally maybe during one hour and I had my hand in her panties under her black tunics as if it was normal all long. After a while, that eventually perturbed her all the same thus she kissed me then sucked me, I licked her and she jumped on me. Here is a summary that straight ahead gets to the point! 😉

We began to kiss, her on me. She came by rubbing herself but she did not make too much noise. A shot in missionary then, before taking her doggy-style while pulling her hair. I dunno why, she had told me that she did not really like making the dog on all fours but me I adore playing the trainer and submitting the bankers. Finally that did not seem to displease her… that was probably just a prejudice like that! All this commotion lasted several hours, without lying. At least 2. I thus put interests to the bank then removed them then put  them back and so on.

At the end of the rodeo, she complimented me “I really like the way you lick“. “Thanks you, yours is good too“. She told me that it changed her from the other bankers she is used to who brag all the time but are tight-ass in fact. Me I brag but at least I am funny and a good lover. 😉 Having said that, I imagine that they are many, between the customers and those who work with her, who want to take her against the reception office by making her bulge her files!

The only negative point of this story it is because she wanted to do too much, she wanted to caress my testicles when I took her in missionary with legs on my shoulders. Me I don’t like that one caresses my testicles, nor licks them ! Besides, she saw nothing there thus she sent their hands there blindly… And all at once I felt a big pain. I withdrew: I saw my right testicle that went back up, I slapped it to make it come down back on its place. As I write, ie more than 12 hours later, I have still pain even when I do not touch (when I touch too of course) but I have the impression that it is back in place. It is certainly just a bruise, well I hope: I checked on allodocteur just now and Michel Cymès started to enumerate all the possible pathologies, what had the effect of giving me an enormous dizziness and I collapsed. I’m not kidding… I switched off the computer and took a lexomil.

Except for this misadventure, she’s really nice this girl! Cutie, good energies, cultivated, intelligent, open-minded. I spent a good moment, I guess that she too, thus we logically wished to extend it. She cooked me something and we spoke until 1:30 (am of course). Ah, and I love her cat. For God’s sake, I have not still talked about her cat but I have fallen in love with it. Too beautiful, too kind, too soft. It is a big Persian long-haired white chinchilla with magnificent round quite brilliant green eyes. He put me hairs everywhere, the scamp. Well, needs to say that I spent hours caressing it (almost as much as its owner) and he gave me kisses with its quite pink nose (almost as much as its owner). It seems that it does not love everybody then I appreciate the compliment!

To return to this girl whom cat and not pussy was long-haired, she told me quite a lot of things that caught my attention (me I don’t talk much, I don’t like it) :
– She has already made orgies, thus it is interesting. She told me that she lived with one of her buddies as a roomy a few months ago. One day, they made a drinking party and threw the idea “what if we made an orgy ?“. A girl in the assembly was OK… boom, first 3some! She started loving girls as a consequence. She invited then her friends under a false pretext then they made them drink and were pushy. She says that the girls are very curious and very often agree to try when they put them in front of the fait accompli. She told me that it had failed only once, for 6 or 7 tries. Some just banged ONLY her roommate, on the other hand. Her maximum was a 4some. Me too. At the moment, at least. Thus I say to myself that we could try a 5some: Padawan, 6ft, the Corsican, my banker (and me obviously). About orgies, she tells that, like me, she feels shivers and energy that invade her during several days after the act. It is what makes me say that the world would go more round if the orgy was a common practice.
– Other than that, she tries to pick up girls in bars too. I’m gonna tell you the story of the heterosexual she picked up in a bar, it’s funny. She cooked her something then kissed her then came down on her breast and everything, the other one resisted then she just said “shh“. So alpha! Then she licked her, the girl came but my beloved banker feigned. She was not satisfied because the very young did not want to try her favorite position: The chisel (they rub themselves mutually their pussies). According to her, the easiest targets, it is between 18 and 20.
– She likes very much that one watches her masturbating, or watching the others doing it. When she was younger, it seems that it was not rare that they did meet up and watch an erotic movie on TV with her boy-friends and girl-friends while masturbating and/or by touching the others.
– I have the impression she frequents weird people all the same (me too I’m weird but well). Like guys who are polygamous (2 girls at the interior in Africa, 1 in France and 1 mistress) and who try to fuck her by finding it totally normal. I also think of her office colleague who gets banged by 5 riff-raffs in a cellar while she is a daughter of rich people. In brief, she told me so many inconceivable things… well, it is good to know that all this shit exists! That is called “having some culture”!!! Well, I guess so… 😉
– She was sick and on antibiotics… but well, I appreciated that she does not cancel the date (it was not contagious).
– Her, what taught her that it is necessary to take advantage of the life and live in the moment, it is that her ex killed himself in front of her home (while they were still together) by doing stupid stuff on his motorcycle in front of a truck.
– A guy told her “you’re beautiful” then vomited on himself in the street while she friendly went back home at 2 am. She asked him if he was not ashamed to be such a waste, he answered that no and that it was normal. Ah OK! It is maybe the case in another galaxy.

Well after all that, I went back home by being quite stressed in the street (nervous up to the skin of the glans). Sleep. Then at noon, I saw Virginia: she cooked me a cake with cherries and we made love. I love this girl, she is really classy and soft. What did I do to deserve her? I don’t know. Or then I don’t deserve her not but I created my luck by multiplying the meetings? No sé, but she is as an obvious fact for me. More and more!

One last anecdote in touch with pokes. A girl, a kid, sent back me one something like 20 pokes then wrote me “what do u want?
– don’t play the hypocrite you know it well
– ah well I would have preferred not to know !!!
– good for you ! so why do you poke me back ?
– I always answer ! and it is a shit your technique
– oh really, who are you for saying what is a shit or not ?” With this, she blocked me without answering. I thought that the matter was resolved. But not even one hour later, a big 16-year-old idiot came talking to me to threaten me (value does not await the passing of years). What about the respect of the seniors ???! Roughly, she went crying next to a guy by telling that I had poked her and put her back in place when she had started bullshiting me. The guy wanted to brag, to show that I was a jerk and a pervert (I’m just quoting him) and thus shine in comparison to maybe fuck her. But no, stupid kid, you will still be asexual in her eyes!!! As a consequence I raised him too and he blocked me in his turn seen that he had no argument. Except that this big shit published my profile on his wall by writing “he is a dangerous crazy pervert, block him, he pokes you to fuck you!” As a result, a lot of kids came to tell me that I had poked their friends and that they were going to find me and that they would kill me when they would see me in the street. Ridiculous! If the girl is not interested (she has the right to don’t like Men ;)), she does not answer and basta… I am not the kind of guy who harasses. It is an illustration of the phenomenon of the monkey that hopes to fuck girls by behaving as society formated him. I took another lexomil (I am going to go in cure of detox if it continues) and sent them all to Hell. I can tell you that they do not like when you don’t give a damn of their opinion or whatever, that drive them crazy to feel your indifference even your contempt. There are all the same fortunately 2/3 of their friends who came to tell me “It’s nothing they are just kids forget them” but also a lot of competition idiots I had not even poked wrote to me “Me, you won’t bang me. Never.
– good for you, I don’t care about your pussy, darling“. It is true, fuck, if they are so idiots, why would I teach life to these pitiful…? It is not because I poke a girl that I beg for her pussy (I poke in automatic mode and sort out then among the answers – it is what I call the rational on-line pick up). From now on I thus won’t answer any more to the girls who will answer my pokes by something else than a compliment otherwise it is going to turn to shit because I’m becoming intolerant to this idiocracy (I would spend too much time and energy in that but I hate not having last word then it is going to be hard). I shall miss some nice fucks but I also avoid quite a lot of headaches! Widely profitable!!!

Well, otherwise, the small banker has already sent me a text. Thus, it is cool! According to her, all those whom I did not fuck and who play the frightened virgins when they receive a poke (because we inculcated them that it is not good for a girl to have sexual thoughts) would have won in discovering the legendary backbone of the PUA of Aix. It is very kind of her to tell me that… I am going eventually turn red with swelled ankles if it continues! That would not be really esthetic. 🙂

It’s up to you now!!! Read Secrets for seducing on the Internet if you don’t know how to start!!!

May the God of the Game be with us, poor men who undergo the bullshit of our counterparts and the moods of the women !