I don’t need to be good with women
« At the beginning, they do not like me. My approach is not terrible, my eye contact is strange. They move back when I approach them. When I take their hands, they sometimes make a weird head. They turn the head when I try to kiss them. They tell to their friends that I am a weirdo. » But in spite of that, I eventually sleep with most of them.
I don’t want to be good with women
I very slightly exaggerated, but it was in order that you understand my mindset. I do not try to be good with women. I want, in a sense, to be bad. I do not want to be really loved. I do not want to be a seducer who never makes any mistake. Thinking that we are good with women puts us under too much pressure (we have to prove things) so I SAY THAT IT DOESN’T WORTH IT.
Here is the biggest secret of the community of the seduction. Understanding this simple truth can radically change your dating and sexual life : « They do not need to appreciate you to sleep with you. »
Girls bang all the time guys whom they do not find handsome. Who are those men ? Guys who tactilely took initiatives, who did not give importance to her resistance and who persevered. Guys who proposed her sex deprived of any guilt, realizing their fantasies. Their physical escalation, their perseverance and their aggressiveness allowed them to overcome her blockings : She will can say that it was their fault.
Sleeping with dozens of women does not mean that women love you. It is the good AND the bad news.
Thorny and paradoxical problem of the « puritan whore » is still titillating you.
You like believing that women sleep only with guys they love, or at least that they like or appreciate. You do not want to open your eyes on the fact that it is very easy for them to bang any guy, accurately chosen randomly. We are not equal on this point: men propose, women arrange. You do not want to imagine that your friend has already fucked with strangers after 15 minutes of conversation ? In the toilets of a club, moreover… And worse, with somebody whom she appreciated not that much.
« I thought that if a woman slept with me it meant that she liked me. » Another recollection of the fantasy of purity. It is not to depress you or whatever but she was attracted at the moment, that’s it. That maybe hurts the ego but it is not such a bad news.
Lover or husband ?
Do you still think that you need to be the most interesting guy of the bar? The guy with the best techniques of seduction ? The most handsome, the biggest, the richest or the one with the best work ?
The problem it’s thatt the best on the paper is not the one who wins at the game of the fast seduction. Being a good guy WILL HARM you, in reality. In fact, because you are so interesting on the paper, she will make you wait longer before giving up. At the same time, you will need to qualify yourself with the risk of losing the deal all the time. For others, those whom she does not envisage as potential boyfriends, she sees them as occasional lovers and behaves differently. It is exactly the effect we look for. And when we will have slept with her, we can intend to keep her if the complicity is there.
You have to become more aggressive and persevering. Be a more sexual guy. A guy who pushes the interactions always farther. A guy who proposes her sex deprived of any commitment, of everything re-bites, of any guilt. Be the pervert, the one who can satisfy her dirtiest fantasies with complete impunity. Has no evil there to do yourselves good between willing adults.
Does she really like me ?
If you are convinced that a woman sleeps only with guys she likes, the objective of your physical escalation will be to see if she likes you or not! Nevertheless, the technique of the tactile progress is only a tool which serves to create attraction and to turn her on. For example, if you caress her hand and that she does not answer at once, you are going to interpret this lack of reciprocity like the fact that she does not want you.
And what happens if you try to kiss her and she turns the head? If you’re looking for affection, it will frustrate you. You will find it very hard not to sulk. You will have no strength to persevere in this case. But when you will have understood that she does not need to appreciate you in order to suck you, you will chuckle simply, will maintain her eye contact and will try again. That’s it, having balls.
The reason why the guys cannot ignore the resistance of a woman nor be persevering it is because they do not use the physical escalation in the right way. The physical escalation is a tool which serves to tempt her to fuck, not to discover to what extent she appreciates you. When a guy associates the reactions of a woman to a judgment, he is too much intimidated. Too sensitive. And he does shit. In other words, he makes all these errors which push away the women and tempt them not sucking your cock. When you wish that a woman sleeps with you, you persevere in your progress. It is the main ingredients of the recipe which will allow you to fuck in abundance without complicating things.
Do not misunderstand what follows: you can kiss her if that pleases you. And maybe that you don’t care sleeping with her, that the simple fact of kissing her satisfies you. Except that it is the same principle which comes into play here : you feel validated so you can be satisfied with just kissing her. We will talk again about it later, but it is necessary to handle the kiss with precaution.
Of course you want that she likes you. And you have no doubt on the fact that she will love you even more, once naked and inside her. Women are landed by guys who represent big challenges and by the worst losers of the Earth and they are vulnerable in all the assaults of the male sex. This is why they try to make you have a hard time, to test you. To see what you are worth, if you are up to it (even if THEY do not deserve you, that’s the thing which can be irritating). Know as well, that girls who are not of your social standing will not very feel at ease with you. They look for men of their level even a little better but not less good nor really better.
It is cruel, but the women who really appreciate you, who like spending hours on the telephone and strolling with you do not want to have sex with you.
Extract from : The (inconvenient) truth about gender relations