Definition of sexual tension
Sexual tension is a kind of connection necessary for the perpetuation of the species that tries to attract two individuals into each other. It is this moment when two people look at each other and know inevitably what is going to happen because they feel a strong desire for each other (there is therefore a notion of reciprocity, contrary to the sexual drive). This magical feeling is the simple manifestation by which nature makes two people understand that they are compatible. Often, the sensations provoked are disturbing and close to the nervousness (that explains the choice of the word “tension”).
The power of sexual tension
The little secret we all know but nobody wants to talk about is that the sexual tension between the two sexes is so powerful that if we were still wild, free, and if we let ourselves go, then everyone would have sex with almost everyone.
It would be a mess outside… that’s why the society wants to condition us to reduce the sexual tension. That is why men invented religions, clothes, burka, non-mixed schools and so on. To protect themselves… because each sex has power over the other, and that’s what scares us. How many men or women have lost money or ruined their marriages because of an affair, for example?
How sexual tension works
Sexual attraction is based on automatic responses and is natural. In other words, there is not much more to do, sexual tension is underlying almost every interaction between a man and a woman. There is almost always tension between a man and a woman (to varying degrees – sometimes it is lurking in the shadow, sometimes it is very obvious, but it usually only needs intensification). And, by definition, this tension is sexual. Of course, girls do not want to sleep with all the guys they meet, but if a man interferes skilfully in their perimeter of intimacy (for example if they found themselves in underwear in front of a guy, and if this guy gave them a great massage on a bed), the idea would surely cross their minds. Moreover, often as soon as one person is conscious that she is liked by the other, she changes her gaze on the person and the relationship changes (that’s why you should manifest it more or less subtly soon enough).
Everything men need to increase sexual tension (sometimes you start from almost zero with a girl and it is difficult, sometimes there is something strong by default without having anything to do and it is enough not to spoil) is:
– using a seducing visual contact;
– getting closer to the girl;
– touching her.
Most of the time, the simple fact of getting closer to a girl automatically creates attraction between you two. Something happens with your internal chemistry (pheromones, energies or God knows what) and you interact with one another at an unconscious level. There is nothing you can say or do that is more important than that. It is not sorcery, it is what our ancestors, the prehistoric men, did already before a doggy standing up against the wall of the cave. And yet, they had not any diploma.
Even if you are not especially cool, the good news is that these women can still be attracted to you because you are a human being with balls (compatible with a uterus). I first noticed this phenomenon when I was hanging out with women who did not attract me sexually (not my type) but we always ended at one time or another by touching (elevator, car) and I felt this power of attraction acting on me. For a moment, I wanted to fuck them and then everything was normal again (if they had opened my pants at that time, I would probably have let them do).
More tools to create sexual tension:
– being sincere and humble;
– apologizing sincerely when you have crossed the limits;
– pretending that you are shy while taking initiatives (blowing hot and cold);
– making compliments and a naughty smile;
– keeping quiet and letting her talk;
– being in a situation of logistical intimacy (just the two of you with a bed);
– touching her, making innuendoes, etc.
A problem of compatibility
If yourself, can not feel this bestial sexual connection with a girl, this is not good. Because everyone is not really compatible with everyone. Would you have a good sexual connection with such and such a girl? God alone knows this, but the answer is more often yes than no.
Coming closer to her, therefore, is also to gauge her. If I get closer to her and feel nothing, neither the desire to take her hand nor the desire to feel her hair nor the desire to kiss her neck… so we do not have enough complicity (and probably never will). This is why you have to save time, get closer and quickly see if it will work or not. Moreover, when the current does not pass, it is often reciprocal and it is useless to force.
The traps
Let’s just keep in mind that there’s nothing special to say or do. Sexual tension exists naturally between a man and a woman. It’s already there. Most of the time, sleeping with a woman is the logical next step if you do not break this tension. If you do not break the tension, the attraction naturally increases (and vice versa).
Laughing too much, speaking only to furnish the conversation, reacting exaggeratedly, wiggling in every direction, looking elsewhere, showing your embarrassment by your facial expressions, not assuming that you are a man, are some things that can break the tension. Concretely, if there was only one thing to do, it would be merely to get closer, take her hand and assume your sexuality.
You can create all the tension you need by being sexual and with some kinesthetic escalations. In seduction, never use a tool supposed to create tension if it sacrifices some rapport. Beware, for example, of the following techniques that create tension (good) but break the rapport (bad) :
– being too cocky & funny (being too arrogant);
– being too sarcastic “hey, you’re place is clean, it’s cool”;
– debating on bullshit “I am vegetarian and if you eat meat you are a monster” (I have no problem with vegetarians but it is stupid to fail because of a dispute like that);
– teasing in a bad way (“you put high heels today, it’s to better be a bitch”);
– making awkward comments (“it’s funny you make a weird face when I’m fingering you”).
Sexual tension and beauty
Girls are all the time fucking guys they do not find particularly handsome. For example, guys who were tactilely enterprising. Or guys who have proposed sex without guilt, or to realize their fantasies. Their kinesthetic escalation and their perseverance enabled them to overcome the blockages of girls.
Adopting a confident posture, keeping silent and maintening the eye contact of a woman, then getting closer to her… it’s not just for the handsome guys. No need to be Johnny Depp or Brad Pitt to act like that. Everyone can do it. Still need to dare…
If a girl invited me to her place and started to warm me for example by proposing a strip-poker, even if she was not very beautiful, it would be difficult to resist the temptation. And even if I would not be really interested in her, I might fuck with her. It’s the same for girls: I’ve already slept with babes who did not particularly like me (often late in the evening) simply because we found ourselves in an adequate situation and I had done nothing bad to spoil the sexual tension in the air.
Sexual tension can make you uncomfortable
Understand that if a woman tells you “you are weird” when you are silent and you maintain her eye contact, it just means that she tries to break the tension because she is excited but feels guilty (or because she does not know how to manage herself and confuses all her sensations). Somewhere in her, she feels this powerful sexual tension, which makes her a little scared and tries to lower this level to regain control (it’s a little panic on board).
When you find yourself isolated with a woman (even if she did not resist yet), she can still try to break the rapport. She can search your room, give signs of impatience or anxiety, act or speak in a weird way. Stay cool, and remember she’s just nervous. This is the moment to be sincere, to put her sexually comfortable. In other words, stay calm despite the tension in the air. You are the man, it is up to you to show a good example!
Reassure her while warming her. Then motivate her to participate (if she says “no it’s no”, do not insist because you should not be assimilated to a rapist). If she allows herself (it is easier to don’t say no than to say yes), it is kinda good but she must participate. Facilitate the task of touching you. It’s bad when you’re the one who constantly tries to caress and kiss her because it locks her in the role of the one who “resists”. In a few minutes, she may lose the little attraction she has for you and the tension you have built may fly into smoke.
Now you must be able to put words on those strange feelings that you may have already felt with some members of the opposite sex. So learn how to control sexual tension, how to make it rise and explain to the girls what they feel to reassure them and sleep with them.