I was wandering on YouTube at lunchtime and I discovered this video of AndyRaconte: The True Meaning of the Breaking up sentences.
I thought it was well considered, frankly. Breaking up sentences (like most sentences to put nice rakes) are often indeed crappy excuses.
In her video, Andy had fun giving the true meaning of these excuses. What hides behind. She says it is based on real facts and a lot of research on forums of se… loveeeeee. It does not surprise me.
Below are my favorite ones:
1/ You deserve better! = I deserve better!
2/ I think it goes too fast … = You invaded me and you’re starting to scare me …
3/ I love you, but as a friend. = You do not excite me at all.
(on the other hand there are friends who turn us on)
4/ I do not know what I want … = Can I keep you on hand in case?
5/ I know you’ll find someone good! = Anyone as long as it is not me…
6/ It cannot work but you’re someone great. = Do not kill yourself, I do not want to have your death on my conscience.
(this is often the case in most excuses)
7/ I’m still thinking about my ex … = You’re just a gap-filler…
We agree, getting back with an ex is like swallowing your vomit.
(I especially agree with the part about vomit : if it did not work the first time, it’s for a reason)
8/ I need to focus on my career. = I just want a sex.
(“but if a tall, handsome and rich guy wanted to marry me, I would say yes”)
9/ There is also the simplest technique, the technique of the coward : it’s just playing dead. There’s no one anyùpre, you will not answer to calls, text messages, messages on the answering machine or on FB and you will wait until the person finally understands after a few days or weeks that you are no longer together.
(sometimes cowardly person is so coward that she does not assume she is playing dead so occasionally she sends a message that basically says she is unavailable or too busy to meet up – must see roughly if the message communicates disinterest)
10/ The most devious excuses because can be done very easily: “I need a break.” = I fuck someone else and I just need time to know who I prefer.
(or so: I want to break up definitively but gently so one step after the other)